Original air date: November 29, 2012
It's Turkey Lurkey time!! It's also time for Sectionals where we get the shortest and most baffling performance from New Directions. Drama soars and strange moments abound as we dive into Thanksgiving.
We open the episode with Quinn who we haven't seen in forever which gets you super hyped. A bunch of other OGs come out and soon the old glee club is reunited, save for Rachel and Kurt. They are reunited for the holidays, like they promised and everyone is smiles and hugs. I also want to point out that they are here for Thanksgiving and they sing a mash up of Homeward Bound by Paul Simon and Home by Greg Holden. Why did I bring this up? Well, because Paul Simon appeared on SNL to sing Still Crazy After All These Years dressed in a turkey costume so it seems very fitting that they sing one of his songs for their Thanksgiving song. But they should have sung Still Crazy,
 |
| What are you gonna do? |
We then get a monologue from Marley where she tells us that she dreamed of singing on stage in a beautiful dress and thanks to Sectionals, that dream is coming true. She says her mom is doing great with her diet and has lost 12lbs. She hasn't lost as much though and girl, no shit. What would there be to lose? She's a string bean. She's determined to keep up her crazy dieting and purging until after Sectionals though because she wants to look her best and make everyone proud because they're all depending on her. Yes, looking emaciated and like you're going to die is certainly looking your best. Obviously, the actress isn't really doing this and looks fine but that just makes this even worse for the teens watching this. Seeing this beautiful skinny actress who says she has to lose weight and I get it, body dysmorphia can affect anyone for any reason but this show is not talking about body dysmorphia, and they certainly aren't going to give this situation much care or consideration.
The OG glee gang meet up at Breadstix to celebrate their reuniting. Santana asks if anyone's heard from Rachel or Kurt. Mike says that Blaine told him he tried to text Kurt but he won't text back. I mean, duh? Look, mistakes happen and I don't think people who cheat (unless they're going out of their way to always do so and keep cheating on people), deserve to be forever ostracized but I am confused by the characters' confusion that Kurt wouldn't want to talk to Blaine. It really feels like they're minimizing Blaine's transgression here and I don't like it. Quinn brings up the train ticket Rachel bought for Quinn and that she's emailing pointing out that Quinn hasn't used it yet. Hmm, little something for the Faberry's out there. Quinn is thriving at Yale though and everyone is happy about seeing everyone. Finn then asks them all for a favour.
Cut to the next day at glee club. Finn announces the seniors and says that any one of them could be president someday. Artie doesn't agree that any of them could and hard agree on that. The point is, Finn brought them here to pair off with the newbies. The two Pucks are paired together, Mike is paired with Ryder, Marley is paired with Santana, Kitty is paired with Quinn (and looks very excited about it), and Unique is paired with Mercedes to which Brittany is horrified to see that Mercedes has been cloned. I think what could be a funny bit about Brittany not realizing Mercedes and Unique are two different people is very marred by the fact that this is a kind of racist thing with White people believing all Black and POC people look the same so it's very awkward. Finn wants Marley and Blaine to handle the duet and their showstopper will be....wait for it....Gangnam Style. He's 100% serious. An English speaking American high school is going to sing a song from Korea. A joke song from Korea is their serious finale. I don't understand how anyone thought this would be a good idea. Ok, I can see how Finn would think it's a good idea but the writers? We've had some amazing competition performances and this is what they came up with as the first competition for our new class of glee club. I'm flabbergasted. Santana takes issue but only with the fact that she doesn't think Finn will be able to whip these kids into shape with good choreography. I mean...yes but also his big song choice is Gangnam Style. Why? Finn voluntells Mike that he's going to show them the dance moves and he asks which guy is going to take the lead with Brittany. The camera looks between Ryder and Jake but Sam interjects that he can do it. He starts dancing like a stripper because this show loves to joke that they made a desperate underage teen into a stripper for laughs. But like, why can't Sam? Why is Sam not the lead male this season? Why can't we have nice things? I will continue to ask because we were robbed with this show.
We cut to Ryder and Jake talking together in the hall about the dancing. Jake admits to Ryder that he went out with Marley last Friday when Marley pulled a bitch fit about Ryder needing to reschedule. Ryder asks if they're a thing now and Jake full on says that it's not if they're going to be mortal enemies again and then clears the record that he isn't going to hump and dump Marley because she's #notlikeothergirls. You know what's funny? A story like this with two guys lusting after an avatar for me while the bad boy exclaims that I'm special would have totally done it for me as a teen. Now, this type of storyline makes me viscerally angry. It plays into the whole Madonna/Whore complex that is engrained in us from a young age and implies that there are girls who it's ok to treat like shit because they're sluts or whatever. Kids, don't buy into this garbage, it's harmful to everyone. Some girls worry about exploring their sexuality and of being seen as imperfect should they want to explore it, other girls are made to feel ashamed for exploring their sexuality. It's a losing scenario that pits girls against each other when we should all be standing together in solidarity. Build up your fellow women, ladies. Anyway, Ryder says that he shouldn't break things off for him but asks Jake not to snake the dance solo from him because he doesn't get to have everything. Jake says it's all his even though we already know that he scrounges up any extra money he and his mom has to take dance lessons. I'm liking Jake a lot more now, to be honest. They did a really terrible job introducing us but I know they wanted us to see that he's a badass first and then show how much he's changed for Marley, I guess?
In New York, Rachel confides in Kurt about losing the part in The Glass Menagerie. I'm glad she failed her first audition, it would have been too easy for her to have gotten this one. She's going to spend the long weekend prepping for the NYADA showcase so she gets in. She then asks if Kurt put in his application and he confirms. Rachel and Kurt try to convince themselves that they're ok with not going back home for the holidays even though Kurt misses his dad and their friends and Sectionals is also this weekend. Rachel says that going home makes her feel sad and like she's not moving forward but she really just wants to avoid Finn, probably. They pinky promise about having the best New York Thanksgiving ever.
Back in Ohio, Mike is showing the boys some dance moves to K-Pop. Finn watches them, looking for the best one, I'm guessing. Sam starts improving in some of his stripper moves again and mentions that he calls one the "big tipper" because big bills would always come flying. I don't want to dismiss sex work because it is work and should be respected but I just want to give Sam a big protective hug because he was too young to be doing that. (I know he's fictional and that the actor is of age but in the context of this story, this "joke" is really heartbreaking). Finn notices Ryder doing really well and is excited because Ryder is his 2.0. Jake is intentionally tanking and looking terrible so that Ryder gets the part and looks a bit sad about it. It's clear he loves to dance so intentionally tanking and not being able to show off your gift is a bummer. Ryder wins the part.
The girls are all getting schooled by Quinn, Santana, and Mercedes about how good they have to be. Quinn talks about how her, Santana, and Britt always knew what the other one was going to do on stage because they were so in sync. Our newbies ask for a demo and we get treated to another Unholy Trinity performance that is honestly so fucking good. They do Come See About Me by The Supremes and it really brings you back to the first season and their cute performance of Say a Little Prayer but it's even better because Santana and Britt are actually singing too. Also Diana sounds really good, like the best she's ever sounded. Sorry, I'll stop fawning over the OG cast now. Kitty loves the performance too but Santana notices that Marley looks upset and asks if she's ok because she looks ill. Marley says she's just tired from all the rehearsing and books it out of there.
Kitty confesses to Quinn that she would have thrown a hissy if she wasn't paired with Quinn because she idolizes her and wants to be just like her. She sees her as Cheerios royalty. Kind of funny considering how most of the show she was kicked out or it barely factored but sure. She did finish off her school career in Cheerios and I do believe they took home Nationals. Kitty then shows her a creepy picture in her locker of Quinn with a halo over her because she aspires to be her. Quinn is distracted by Marley though and asks what's up with her since she seemed off in rehearsals. Kitty tells her that Marley is sweet as pie and she's tried to be a good friend to her but she's been acting odd ever since she got with Jake. She then plants some seeds in Quinn about how Jake is pressuring Marley to lose her v-card to him and that no one knows better than Quinn about what happens when a good girl mixes with a Puckerman. Quinn looks concerned.
Marley is talking with Jake about how she can't believe he's not the one dancing with Brittany since she's seen his dancing and he's amazing. Jake admits that it's an honour thing with Ryder. He says that he's been cool about him dating Marley and he really wanted the solo so Jake is trying to do Ryder a solid. Marley asks if he's willing to do Ryder this favour even if it means they lose Sectionals. He promises to help Ryder be great and then asks if he can walk her to lunch because she's been skipping out on him all week. Uh oh. Marley can't because she has to rehearse because she's not going to let the team down. Careful what you say there, Marley.
Rachel is upset to find out that Brody is going to be teaching Dance 101 today since Kate Hudson was unavailable for filming. She tries to walk out and makes a valid point about paying a huge tuition to be taught by a professional and not their TA but still pretty rude. Brody asks if she's mad at him and she says she is because he slept with Cassandra. Brody asks why she cares which is valid. They weren't dating. Also, her anger and resentment should be towards Cassie because she's the one who did it to be vindictive. Brody points out that she broke off their date to go see Finn so like...was he supposed to intuit that she wouldn't get back together with her longtime boyfriend? Rachel asks him if it at least sucked but Brody refuses to placate her ego and says it was amazing. He then says that they're friends and that he doesn't want to hurt her so he promises not to sleep with Cassie again. Rachel seems ok with this and they talk about their Thanksgiving plans. Rachel says she and Kurt are cooking a meal for themselves so Brody invites himself along and offers to cook for them. She agrees and they continue to dance together. Damn, I still really like Brody. It's a shame the writers don't want her to be with him.
Puck is proud of Jake for helping Ryder out because he always put his bros before hos. He says this as he then insults Quinn, you know the girl he knocked up who was dating his best friend? Was he putting bros before hos then? Also, since when does he hate Quinn? Why are all guys on this show so quick to slut shame her and villainize her? Quinn storms up to Jake and tells him to back off of Marley. Jake is confused but Quinn says that he's trying to pressure her into sex. Jake is still confused because obviously, Kitty made this up. Quinn says that he's a distraction to Marley and they can't win if she's distracted. They're placing a lot of stock in Marley and yes she's a good singer but so are a lot of the girls so I don't understand why they're giving her the Rachel treatment. They also proved they could win without Rachel too so again, this is weird. Puck says that Quinn is being loopy and irrational which are two words I really hate that guys use against women to belittle their anger. Sure, they don't understand where she's coming from but Quinn does have a justified reason to be upset with Puck. Though I will say, her being super protective over Marley feels weird considering they barely know each other. This is just a weird little scene, ok?
Kurt is closing the Vogue offices when he notices that Isabelle is still working. They bond over both loving Lord of the Rings and Les Mis and then talk about Thanksgiving plans. Isabelle says she's probably going to be by herself so Kurt offers for her to come to his and Rachel's "orphan dinner" in Bushwick. Isabelle is for this and asks if she can bring some friends and Kurt agrees. She then points out that he's in a better mood and asks if he's patched things up with Blaine. Kurt says that he hasn't and is moving past that chapter of his life. Isabelle says that he should at least forgive Blaine so that he himself can move on which is, I guess a nice thought but there are times where I don't think forgiveness is necessary. I think it's fine to not forgive someone for betraying your trust or Kurt should at least do it when he's ready or wants to and not because people are sad for poor Blaine who is just trying to apologize.
Quinn is giving Kitty some more advice and Kitty is eating it up. She leaves as Santana enters and Santana is not buying her nice act. She tells Quinn that Kitty is evil and gave Marley laxatives. We cut to a brief scene where Santana is ruffling through Marley's bag and finds laxatives which Marley claims she forgot were even in there. Santana can sense that Kitty gave them to her. Not sure how she jumped to that conclusion but I suppose it's easier to say she just knows than to actually write something satisfying, right Glee writers? Anyway, Quinn won't believe Santana and immediately turns on her so I guess they're not that in sync? She thinks Santana is jealous of her and her cool life at Yale where she's dating her 35 year old professor which is being used to once again make fun of Quinn when the actual loser here is her 35 year old professor going after an 18/19 year old. Santana pushes back and says Quinn is defining her life with a guy yet again so Quinn says she's just shaking pom poms in Kentucky and then Santana shoots back that her professor must be so impressed that she's a teen mom who barely visits her daughter.
 |
| SLAP FIGHT!! |
I probably laughed way too hard at this scene. Brittany comes in and asks what's going on. Quinn says that nothing is going on and cleans herself up before walking out. Santana remarks that Quinn is a genius slapper. I don't know what that means but we got a slap fight up in here and that's what truly matters.
Ryder is listening to Gangnam Style while trying to dance. Jake walks in and comments that his moves aren't looking great. Ryder complains that he can't concentrate on the moves until he memorizes the lyrics and this is all Finn's fault. He really expected a bunch of English speaking Ohio high schoolers to learn a fully Korean song and dance to it in like a week? It seems like a week since they were all talking about Thanksgiving and being home for Thanksgiving and I think I'm being generous here with saying a week. Jake tries to help him with some moves and Ryder realizes how good Jake is and that he definitely through the dance audition for him. And then they kiss. No, sorry that would be more interesting actually but like, what a good rom com that would be. Anyway, Jake agrees to help Ryder learn the moves and they lean in close together and kiss. Nope, sorry, wrong thing they actually lean in close to watch the Gangnam Style video again.
Brody is saying he's going to cook their turkey in a bag much to Kurt's disgust. Rachel then forgets she's vegan and says she's a vegetarian instead and helps Brody butter the turkey. He helps her and they rub the turkey together all flirtily and Kurt asks them to please just put it in the oven already. I completely get that, how awkward to be the third wheel here. Rachel says that it's almost time for sectionals and reminisces about her first one. She said she looks in a mirror and monologued to herself.
We segue to Marley doing this because, you'll recall, she's the New!Rachel. She also says that she's super hungry but that at least her dress fits. She goes to eat a tic tac but then puts it down instead because apparently she thinks she's Mr. Creosote and one thin mint will make her explode. That's a reference for the oldies, you're welcome. Marley leaves the bathroom and sees Unique getting ready too. She happily calls to her (but calls her Wade accidentally first), and they hug. She asks if Unique is allowed to wear the dress and Unique reaffirms to me that she is indeed trans with the way she describes herself. She says her parents are trying to protect her but that if she isn't true to herself, at least when she's performing there won't be anything left of herself inside to protect and if that doesn't sound like someone who is a girl being forced by her parents to dress as a boy against her wishes, I don't know what is. Marley compliments Unique for her bravery and self-assurdness and wishes that she could be more like her.
The girls are called backstage for the traditional show circle. Finn explains that Will made it up which is odd because I'm pretty sure show circles are a common thing that existed before Glee but whatever. Finn wants to add to it too. Apparently it's giving Joe something to do because I don't know, they keep forgetting he's here and won a competition for a role on this show and they gotta honour that so he's asked to lead them in a prayer because he's the jesus guy. Remember? He's really religious and has locs, that's his character. After the prayer, Finn gives an inspiring speech about how they're going to be great because he didn't ask them to learn a song in an unfamiliar language a week before the competition. Oh wait...he did. They're screwed. I will say this one thing I liked, that the treble clef pin they gave to Finn last episode is on his lapel right now and I think that's sweet. See? I can say nice things. Sometimes.
 |
| Nice bit of continuity, glee team. You did it! |
The sectionals judges this year are kind of boring so I'm not really going to grace them with introductions. Sorry judges. We start right off with the Warblers singing Whistle by Flo Rida. It's catchy but I'll admit, it's kind of funny for an all boy's choir who were previously coded as gay to sing a song about blow jobs. Blow my whistle, indeed. There was no way New Directions was going to win pitting Gangnam Style against this. The Warblers actually get two numbers this episode which is a shock because the rivals usually only get one to the New Directions' three. We're in for some disappointment, folks. They sing Live While We're Young by One Direction. Our nemesis/pal Sebastian/Grant Gustin is taking the lead for this one which is nice because his voice is good in spite of playing an unlikable douche in this show. Also, what do either of these have to do with Foreigner? Wasn't that the theme or was that just something that Finn pulled out his butt to make everything more difficult and less enjoyable for us? Marley has "oh shit" face because of how good and not complicated their songs were.
We're back in New York now and Rachel is lighting candles for their big dinner. Kurt asks how she is and she says that she's starting to feel sad because she misses the holidays where her and her dads would sing holiday mashups over an assortment of pies. This is a set up which I didn't really pay attention to which made what's about to happen even more wtf but I'm pretty sure it's still wtf. They ask Brody how the turkey is coming along. He says they're just about to eat when they hear the doorbell. Kurt answers, expecting Isabelle but it's a whole bunch of people, the friends she had asked to invite. Kurt looks a bit stunned because now they're suddenly throwing a party. Ok, I'd find that a bit rude. You're invited to a dinner, you are allowed to invite some friends but most people would probably expect maybe two and that it's still a dinner but instead she just turns it all into a party? I don't know, they're young so they're all for it and I'm just a boring introverted homebody so what do I know? Kurt asks them if they've heard from Isabelle because he can't get hold of her and honestly? Even more rude. You send your friends to someone else's house and show up after them? Ok, I'm treating this with far too much seriousness because really, this is a set up for Isabelle to call and get us started on a rousing rendition of Let's Have a Kiki by The Scissor Sisters. Everyone dances around singing and then Rachel just cuts right in with Turkey Lurkey Time which is from Promises, Promises. I love how everyone just stops for a second like, what? Then they all join in because it's fucking turkey lurkey time, bitches! Then they get right back to their kiki to finish things off. That scene was pointless but oh so much fun at least. More than I can say for what's to come. Rachel and Kurt think this is the best Thanksgiving ever.
Sue has actually brought her baby, Robin, to Sectionals because she's fussy and she'll wail all through their performance. Classic Sue. Will shows up which thrills Emma. They kiss happily because they're currently apart because of Will's committee thing. Then the Rosedale Mennonite choir starts to sing. They do a mashup of Over the River and Through the Woods, and She'll be Coming 'Round the Mountain. Honestly, they're pretty damn good. I feel like even without what happens, they'd still place above New Directions.
Sam peeks out from the curtains and spots Will. He tells everyone he's here. Meanwhile, Blaine gets a call from Kurt and excitedly answers it. Kurt tells him that he believes he's sorry and while he's trying to forgive him, he's just not there yet. This is super fair and honestly, more than Blaine deserves. Kurt even says that he can't stand not talking to him even though he's mad at him because he's his best friend. He then offers to meet up with Blaine at Christmas so they can talk and maybe even ice skate. They end the call with I love you's and blah. I'm happy for you Klainer's I suppose but this still feels too easy. Kurt goes back inside to his party. Isabelle immediately sees he's sad or maybe intuits that he finally talked to Blaine and she gives him a hug. People may find this weird but honestly, I had a really great boss like this. We didn't hang out personally but she was absolutely supportive like this. Good bosses do exist, they're rare but they exist.
Back at Sectionals, Marley is barely holding herself together both because of nerves and her starving herself. Jake asks her if she's ok and finally at least gets her to admit that she's super nervous. She says she hasn't slept in days and she feels cold when it's warm and she's worried they're going to lose and it will be all her fault. Ryder overhears and busts into their conversation to ask Jake for a favour. Jake asks if it can wait because he's kind of in the middle of a crisis already and Ryder says it can't because he sprained his ankle and needs him to take the dance lead. Jake calls his bluff and Ryder pulls him aside, away from Marley. He says that Jake is the better dancer and you don't cut the best quarterback just to be nice. He wants to win and so they need the best out there. Jake looks back at Marley and then agrees because he understands that Ryder is trying to take some pressure off her. Honestly, both these characters seem cool now. It's too bad Blake still sucks.
The gang heads out to do their number and, you know what? It's not horrible. For all my complaining, it's not as bad hearing it when it wasn't everywhere at the time and people were making fun of it despite it being an intentional goofy song and video but us English speakers were too dumb to get it and just thought it was someone trying to be serious. I do kind of side-eye that Tina finally gets a big solo only for it to be Korean. Now Jenna is of Korean descent but she's American through and through. She apparently had to learn the words phonetically which any of them would have to do. I'm sure she was fine with it, probably happy to get a solo, but it just feels a bit questionable to have her do the bulk of it. One moment I liked during the song was Kitty taking Quinn's advice and winking at the old man judge and then Quinn nods her approval. That was a funny little moment. As they finish up the song, Marley starts looking a bit dizzy and ends up fainting. The crowd falls silent, her mom looks shocked. Everyone rushes over and we fade out. It's a cliffhanger, folks!
 |
| There she goes |
So, that was Thanksgiving. It's a bit disappointing for a competition episode. In the past, these were always the most anticipated because the performances were so strong. I know they wanted a two-parter and to end on New Directions for that but it was a lot of waiting for them to do their big performance only for it to be Gangnam Style and then a fade to black. We saw more of the Warblers performance which is odd. I don't think they were gonna beat The Warblers even without Marley fainting only because I just don't think it was that good a performance. Definitely less cringey with some distance from the whole Gangnam phenomenon but definitely not competition worthy. I wonder if this was the plan to like lower our expectations of the new kids so that anything after this would seem better but I know they're going to try to trot out original songs again so...that's not gonna happen. But we'll have to wait and see for that and we're gonna have to wait until next recap to find out what happens to Marley in Swan Song.
Comments
Post a Comment