Dawson's Creek - 403 - Two Gentlemen of Capeside

Original airdate: October 18, 2000

Sorry for the delay in recaps, it's been a crazy week but let's start the New Year off right with a trip to the Creek. Holy shit, I'm a poet and I didn't even know it. Sorry, I'll stop.


This episode does not start off super promising as Joey and Dawson are in English class together and the teacher is discussing Two Gentlemen of Verona. Drew is also there and pulling Joey's hair and excuse you, YOU ARE NOT GILBERT BLYTHE, sir and you must cease and desist at once. It is not charming, you are not charming and I resent the writers trying to give teenage me a heart attack because I think they're setting up this douche canoe coming between my ship. Thank you.

Me to the writers except we never fall in love

So basically, Joey tells him to back off and then gets in trouble with the teacher. She is then asked to explain what Two Gentlemen of Verona is about. I haven't read it for myself so I can't confirm if the show is accurate but Joey says it's about a girl who comes between two guys which is obviously a commentary on the Joey/Dawson/Pacey thing so this should be fun, I say to myself while my voice drips with sarcasm and disdain.


First off, I really resent the way they've presented the whole scenario, placing the blame on the woman and not the two guys who act like assholes to each other because they happen to find the same girl attractive. I'm about to get more pissed off when the teacher asks for Joey's opinion on the piece:

Joey: I didn't think it was very realistic. I mean, Valentine is this cardboard-cutout hero, and Proteus is unfairly painted as a villain. I just think these scenarios are actually a lot more complicated.

So, she is absolutely right that these scenarios are much more complicated than Nice Guy/Bad Guy but my hackles are up because I sense bullshit afoot. Dawson chuckles at her answer so yep bullshit is coming. Teacher calls him out and Dawson says he doesn't think it's about a girl who comes between two guys but the friendship between the two guys and Joey's like "yeah, which failed when the girl came between them" and I don't really know who I should be more mad at because I've never read the play myself so I can't judge but I just know I don't like either of these takes. One minimizes the role of the woman to the point that she doesn't exist when I'm guessing, she's a pretty major player and the other puts all the blame on the girl for breaking up the friendship between the two guys which breaks my heart because Joey is clearly projecting her own self blame in the Pacey/Dawson friendship destruction.


Girl, Dawson sucks as a friend and you did nothing wrong. I just want to hug her so bad and tell her that it's not her fault that she developed feelings for a guy that happened to be her ex's friend. Dawson goes on to say that the friendship failed because "Proteus (read Pacey) was a lousy friend" and excuse you, Dawson you might want to look in the mirror and say "lousy friend" to yourself a couple thousand times until you realize you're the worst. I laugh when Joey says this though:

Joey: Valentine isn't such a great guy. I mean, he's so fixated on his honor that he totally loses sight of everything else around him.

The beauty of that statement and how true it is. Dawson's pride is what destroyed his friendships. He wanted things to be the way he wanted them and be available when he wanted them and threw a tantrum when he realized that his friends were people with actual feelings of their own. Anyway, I'm going off on a lot of tangents and this is only the opening sting so I better keep things going.


Drew sticks his nose in to get the teacher to force them to do a formal debate which the teacher thinks is a splendid idea and that Drew should help. The whole thing would be due the next day and he looks forward to a debate between the three of them and that's not really how debates work but ok. We have our conflict of the episode and the teacher is surprised they can argue so much over one of Shakespeare's worst comedies. Harsh.


After the credits role, we get a sweet scene between Grams and Jen where she's trying to get Jen up out of her funk because Serial Killer Henry broke up with her to pursue his passion for carving people up and feeding them to pigs. I'm pretty sure that's what happened. I mean, that's the way it played out in my head, at least. Grams tells her that her "fall term" is important and she shouldn't waste it wallowing in heartache. She, therefore, gives Jen a 48 hour cap on her melancholy which Jen thinks she can't do but Grams totally can. She then sends her on her way with an umbrella. Jen is confused because it's super sunny out but Grams tells us that the Farmer's Almanac says it's a "red letter" day which means rain is definitely predicted. OK then.


Dawson asks Joey where she wants to work on their project and I have to call shenanigans on this. I know they want to set up this whole thing where she "has" to work with Dawson and therefore not spend time with Pacey but, I have to say this again, debates don't work this way. If the teacher wants them to do a debate, they should each be working on their own, researching and making points to support their own arguments. Why on Earth would they do this together? to let them know what their arguments are going to be and create a super boring debate? I don't get any of this but let's just go with the drama.


Joey asks if Dawson is ok with them working together because he's kind of been a dink to her since she's been back. Rejecting her friendship brick and just generally being cold to her. I mean, sure he told her about Pacey's failing grades and did try to explain Pacey's intentions rather than piling on with her anger but that's like the bare minimum he could do for her and also, he shouldn't have known that information to begin with except that Mitch is a horrible guidance counsellor. Where was I? Oh yeah, place to work. Joey needs him to come to the yacht club because she has to work. The place is apparently deserted Thursday nights save for an "old geezer" who comes in looking for the prime rib special.


Pacey comes up then which is Dawson's cue to storm off like a little baby. He points this out but Joey thinks that Pacey wasn't too eager to start a conversation with him anyway. Jen says that one of them has to put an end to the silent war between them but Pacey says it's not him and not today because he's celebrating. As we all know, Dawson is the worst and the opposite of having a good time or celebrating so I stand by his decision. Pacey is celebrating because he got an A which is awesome and he wants to go sailing on the last nice day of the year with Joey. Joey can't because she has to work but also because she has a debate she absolutely has to, no contrivances here, work on with Dawson in the room. Pacey is obviously upset but before he can pick a fight, Jen interjects that she'd go with him which is just an awesome friend thing to do. Jen gets so little credit on this show for how great she is. She has two things though, she refuses to make out with Pacey and she will probably puke. Joey jokes that those are her two things too.


Meanwhile, Andie is preparing herself for college interviews. This sounds like a nightmare. I don't remember having to do this to get into my university but I didn't go to a fancy one, just one in my own city because I'm a filthy townie as Joey would say. Anyway, she wants Jack's opinion on how she looks and it's clear from their interaction that Jack hasn't even really applied yet. As she's talking, Andie gets a dizzy spell and Jack offers her a seat until she can collect herself again. Jack asks if it's the new medication she started that's making her dizzy so they are setting something up here. Andie confirms but says that the drug, Nordil, is working better than anything else. We're also informed that it's preventative so I assume that means it keeps her stable so that she won't relapse into needing serious treatment or hospitalization.


Dawson is at home with his parents who are sick and he chastises them about kissing all the time. Dawson, mind your own damn business and let them be happy. God, he's such a buzzkill. Anyway, he tells them he has to go to the yacht club and they're wondering if he's lost his mind but Dawson explains that he's working on a project with Joey. He also explains very quickly that they didn't choose this, it was assigned. Both him and Joey seem to be averse to anyone thinking they chose to work together and I find that funny. His parents ask if he's ok and he gets annoyed that everyone acts like he's going to break just because Joey's name is mentioned. Before I can even laugh Gail actually does me a solid and informs him that he did break apart and Dawson is like "that was three months ago! I'm like totally over it even though I'm still acting like a little bitch every time I see Pacey and Joey together." I, um, paraphrased that.


Anyway, he assures them he's over it so Gail asks about Pacey which irritates Dawson because he's the worst. Then something even more eye raising happens, Dawson blames his father for the grade situation making Pacey hate him even more than before and what? Excuse you? Did I hit my head or something? Am I watching the same show? Pacey hates Dawson...more than before?? Before what? Pacey didn't hate Dawson, Dawson hates Pacey because of the Joey situation. Pacey was rejected by Dawson for daring to develop feelings for Joey. Why is Dawson flipping this around or why are the writers? They are really trying to gaslight us into feeling bad for Dawson or thinking he's the victim in all this but no. I told you, I was there, HE WAS THE COCKADOODIE VILLAIN!!


Mitch inflates Dawson's ego further by telling him that he did the right thing, somehow ignoring the fact that Dawson blamed him for causing a bigger rift in his friendship with Pacey but whatever. Dawson adds that he's all out of doing the right thing for Pacey but asks if he can get them anything. They tell him to just shut the windows in the back since the wind is picking up. Another allusion to the rain that Grams foretold us about.


On the True Love, Jen is enjoying the boat ride but Pacey is worried about Joey spending the afternoon with her "ex-soulmate" and I hate that everyone thinks of them this way. Why are they soulmates? Because they were friends as kids? Do people know what that means? To be honest, from the narrative of this show and how the characters interact, the only real soulmates are like Pacey/Joey and Jen/Jack (platonically) because those two couples were always written to completely understand and care for one another. Dawson is a blithering, selfish idiot who only seems to care about himself and who I don't really see as being anyone's soulmate. Film is his soulmate maybe and that's a bit sad considering he's not very good at it. Anyway, a gust of wind sends them off and Jen worries about the weather but Pacey assures her that the storm is supposed to pass them over.


Back at the yacht club, Drew is being an insufferable ass and Joey takes him to task for it. This prompts him to call out their supposed "sexual tension" using Star Wars comparisons. He equates Dawson to Luke Skywalker, cute, dreamy, and safe. I may have laughed but then he gets to the part where he equates Pacey to Han Solo and I start to get a bit worried about where this analogy is going. I'm proven right when Drew says that Princess Joey is clearly going through her "bad boy phase".

I'm just tired

I have so many issues with his analysis of the situation at hand. Not least of which is the boring trope this show over uses of having bitchy and outlandish characters call attention to our main characters supposed attraction.


Problem the first: Drew has no fucking clue who the hell Pacey is so how does he know that he's the "Han Solo to Dawson's "Luke Skywalker"? I guess we can assume he's pulling assumptions out his ass but still, he has no way of knowing if Pacey is a bad boy and as I already stated in this article right here, he is absolutely not.


Problem the second: I hate the further painting of Dawson as the put upon Nice Guy who is the ultimate hero that Joey "should be with". I HATE IT.


Problem the third: This one's actually just funny but in this little scenario Drew spelled out...Dawson and Joey shouldn't be together anyway because if they are Luke and Leia, then they are siblings. Beautiful metaphor, writers, you just proved why this show could only end with Pacey and Joey together because the other two are brother and sister. You just played yourselves.

And as we all know, you should never play yourself

Dawson's big retort is to ask who Drew is in the Star Wars scenario but it sets Joey up to say he's Jabba the Hut. Old man comes in and interrupts them, asking for his usual table and usual order of prime rib and to make it quick because a storm is coming. Joey gets worried and asks Drew, who is now watching tv to keep an eye out for a storm report. So he can continue not to help them on their project...the project that is supposedly a debate so they don't really need to be working together at all. Ok.


Andie is meeting with Drew's mother who if you'll recall is Super Bitchy Rich Lady from last episode or Mrs. Valentine to get technical on you. She is very impressed with Andie's school record but not with the fact that she doesn't say her one person to have dinner with living or dead is Jesus or with the fact that she missed the end of her last semester. Andie clarifies that she had a medical issue but that she made up all her finals and none of her grades suffered which is a tremendous feat that should be commended but of course SBRL is not going to do that.


Back in the dining area, Dawson and Joey are going over their points or whatever and Dawson complains that they are avoiding the fact that they are avoiding talking about Pacey who has become the whole play. Joey agrees to talk but Dawson doesn't really want to talk so much as state that he and Pacey are never, ever, ever, getting back together. Like ever. Joey asks him why since she was part of the supposed "betrayal" and that is a good point but also? Why is Joey not acknowledging how fucked up it is that Dawson is even calling it a betrayal? I mean, I know he's basically gaslit her into thinking it was but how? How did they betray Dawson at all? He showed no interest in Joey all last season, they were broken up. He didn't even care that Joey started dating that AJ guy. He only cared because he decided he might want to get together again and got mad because Joey had already moved on to something way better and that bugged the piss out of him because he never thought he'd have serious competition for her heart. He just thought he could stroll in whenever and she would give up everything for him. That was season 1 Joey, Dawson and it was super unhealthy so she grew up. Good for her.


Rant over, Joey is too distracted to listen to Dawson's whining about how mean Pacey was for betraying him and not apologizing (he did and you told him to eff off basically) because there's a storm update on the tv and she's worried. She leaves him and goes up to the bar to change the channel on the TV and chastise Drew for not watching it. Why would she assume he'd actually do anything? Old guy asks for his check this instant but Joey wants to hear the report and asks Drew to get it. Again, he's not gonna do it because he doesn't work there and he's just all around lazy and shitty. So she yells at him and continues to watch the tv worriedly.


On the boat, Pacey and Jen argue over the storm. As much as I love Pacey, I side eye him for blaming Jen over the radio batteries burning out. If you wanted to hear the storm report, you could have changed the channel at any time. Jen shoots back that she wouldn't have had to listen to the radio if he'd had more than Zepplin 1-4 tapes and this strikes me as odd only because rock/blues seems to be her jam, especially later in the series. Anyway, Jen is scared but Pacey is still pretty sure all is good because he's seen worse and he can just figure out where the worst of the storm is and navigate around it. Then a wave hits them and shorts out the radio.


 Back with Andie and SBRL, she keeps trying to steer the conversation in other directions but SBRL is determined to keep bringing up her mental health issues. I've given this show a bit of flack for the way they've handled her mental health issues so far. It's very hit and miss but this scene? I really like it. Andie assures SBRL that her mental illness is a strength, not a weakness because it taught her how to ask for help when she needs it. Then Andie politely inquires why they keep coming back to her mental health and SBRL asks innocently if it's a problem to which Andie replies:

Andie: No. Not at all. In fact, most teenagers go through similar experiences. It's nothing to be ashamed of. It's just that I prefer to concentrate on the present and the future. It's just one part of my life. It does not define me as a person.

And I really like that. It's nice that the show acknowledges that it's perfectly normal for teens to break under the enormous amounts of stress they're under and that no one should be ashamed of it. I really like that. SBRL thinks differently though because she's awful. Basically belittling her and telling her that she clearly can't handle the pressure of a more competitive school. I hate that but we're supposed to. She basically dismisses Andie despite all of her accomplishments. It sucks. Andie calls her out for this, proving how confident and strong she actually is but SBRL isn't hearing it. She bids her good day.


In the dining room of the yacht club, Joey is still obsessively watching the tv. Old man asks if the reporter said hurricane force and Joey corrects him that they said exceeds hurricane force and Old Man is upset because he'll never get home now. I find this highly amusing because he was aware a storm was coming, he mentioned it when he first came in but like...he just had to have that prime rib special. I can relate.


Dawson is pissy with Joey and wants to take off because she's not paying attention to him the project. Joey finally uses her words and tells Dawson that Pacey and Jen are out on the boat and he asks her why she didn't say something sooner. She says because it wasn't bad before but now, it's super hella bad.


Jack comes in looking for Andie who comes out looking super rejected thanks to SBRL aka Drew's mother. Some guy comes in looking for SBRL and he's the dock hand who informs her that three ships need help getting back to the docks. Joey asks if one of those ships that radioed in was True Love and now everyone is aware and worried that Pacey and Jen are stuck in a storm. Dock Guy informs them that no boat is registered under that name. Damnit, Pacey where the heck do you dock this thing if it doesn't have a registered slip? Apparently Pacey doesn't have one and just uses which ever slip is vacant. How does that work? Wouldn't he be asked to move constantly? How does he know which ones will be vacant all night from the ones that might be going for an evening sail? Whatever, he's not registered which means he's essentially lost at sea. Joey insists that the boat is out there though.


On the boat, Pacey is getting more and more panicked about the storm and Jen is way past that stage. He does his best to calm her down though and gives her a lifejacket. Jen is worried that bringing the sail down will slow them down but Pacey doesn't want to go back to port since there's too much risk of them crashing into a dock or another boat. Instead, they're going to go to a little cove that he doesn't know the name of. Apparently, it will offer them a bit of protection from the storm so they can ride it out until someone finds them. Jen asks how the hell people are going to find them if they have no radio and they're going to a cove he doesn't know the name of. Pacey's answer? Dawson.

Guess they'll die then

But friends, Dawson did know so I guess everything is fine. Joey is arguing with Dock Guy about rescuing True Love but Dock Guy is like there's three boats trying to get in, we'll escort them all and if they're there, we'll find them. Joey informs him that Pacey wouldn't risk his boat in this weather by trying to dock. Dawson tells them that he'd wait it out by Crescent Cove because they waited a storm out there as kids. DG is like, in this weather that will offer them zero protection why would he go there. Joey deduces that his radio must be broken but DG refuses to risk people's lives out in this storm which is absolutely fair for this guy who is just a dock worker to say. You know who they should call? The Coast Guard? 911? Emergency Workers of some kind? What are they going to do? Steal a boat from the Old Man of course. Stealing boats goes over so well on this show and has never lead Dawson to trouble bef-

Oh god, oh no, oh god, oh no

I'm sorry for that horrific reminder of Dawson's first BJ. Anyway, Dawson decides he the inexperienced sailor who crashed a boat once before and cheated in a sailing race concert, almost crashing into Pacey's boat, should definitely sail out in a storm that an expert refused to traverse earlier. This is a good plan.


Jen is still freaking out on the boat while Pacey still pretends like everything is fine. Meanwhile, Dawson is about to go do his stupid thing when Joey decides that she wants to be stupid too. She tells him that she will not let him go alone and he tries to tell her that she can't come but she says she can't worry about both of them so he let's her come with. Great plan.


In the yacht club, a window shatters when something falls against it and SBRL tells everyone to get down. Old Man aka Mr. Brooks (who is actually going to become a recurring character so I decided to stop calling him Old Man) points out how dumb that is because broken glass is everywhere. She asks where Joey is which makes Drew totally blab to everyone that they took off in Mr. Brooks' boat so he obviously gets off on stirring up shit for everyone. Mr. Brooks is not happy and SBRL is useless in crisis. This prompts Andie to step up and take charge.

She tells Jack to board up the windows with whatever he can find while she goes to the marina offices for help. SBRL doesn't want them to move the tables because ain't no storm gonna mess with her style but Jack moves the tables anyway so that they can all stay dry and not die. Andie challenges SBRL to take charge if she has a better plan and when she stays silent, Andie tells her to make herself useful and call the Leery's and Grams to reassure them that their kids will be alright. She knows their number off the top of her head and wow, I used to be able to do stuff like that but now? My cell phone knows all and without it, I'm lost.

Andie wants Mr. Brooks to come with her since he knows his boats frequency and lastly, tell Drew to clean up and sweep up the glass. He acts indignant as the spoiled rich white boys are wont to do but she takes no bullshit. I really love her character and I'm preemptively sad that they're going to dump her this season. I agree with Kevin Williamson, she's a great character.

On the boat, Jen wants to hear something good but the best Pacey can give her is that the hole in the boat is at least high up. She then suggests that they start telling each other confessions since this might be their last chance to clear their conscience. Pacey claims to have no regrets so Jen goes first and her big regret is that she's never been in love. Suck on that, Henry, you dumb but definite serial killer. Pacey is confused because he thought she had fallen in love with Henry and no, it was definitely not love. The boat rocks a bit which scares her and Pacey.

Pacey finally confesses that he regrets the way things are between him and Dawson right now. Jen suggests saying something but Pacey doesn't see the point as it wouldn't change anything. Jen says that it might just feel good to get it off your chest and as much as I loathe Dawson, this is good advice. Regret where you never get to have closure with someone or apologize for how you might have hurt them is the fucking worst. Even if you won't get forgiveness, it's sometimes just really good for your own heart to get it off your chest and say what you want to say.

Andie is trying to talk with Joey and Dawson to get their coordinates but the ones Dawson gives puts them in Montana which is totally not right. The radio cuts out and we get a gloriously fake shot of a boat in a storm with some bad ADR dialogue over top of it. It's so bad and I love it. They spot them two seconds after wondering if they'll find them which is nice and convenient. They pull up to them and accidentally hit True Love. The scene is a mash of bad ADR as the actors try to do an action scene of them jumping from one boat to the other.

I love this whole thing it's so badly done

Pacey won't leave his boat though for extra tension and so Dawson jumps onto the True Love to rescue him since he's being a knob. Dawson gets one point in his favour this episode because he's willing to risk his life for his friend because his friend is too stubborn to leave his damn boat that is going to sink and he's putting everyone's lives in danger. Damn it, Pacey, you made me give Dawson a point over you. Pacey isn't going to go until Joey calls out his name and he sees how scared she is. He and Dawson jump over to Mr. Brooks' boat just in time for the True Love to sink forever. RIP pretty boat that was the metaphor for Pacephine all last season.

They dock in the harbour where the Leerys are waiting to shower Dawson with praise and relief for his safety. Grams and Jen are reunited as well. Mr. Brooks goes up to Dawson to ask for retribution for the damages to his boat but Grams isn't hearing it. She won't let him take Dawson's college money to fix a boat that he used to save her granddaughter. I love it.

SBRL commends Andie for a job well done but neither Andie or Jack are buying it. Andie threatens to let the board know what a horrible representative she is but then tells her that she's nothing like her so she can give whatever recommendation she sees fit because it probably won't count for much. Ah, this Andie is splendid and I love her. Take that, SBRL!

Meanwhile, Joey lets Pacey have it for being so reckless on the waters. Pacey tells her that the boat represents all of the best memories he's had and everything that's good to him in the world and is having a hard time letting go. Joey won't excuse him though because she was terrified he was going to die. He apologizes for making her so scared and she reminds him that in life and death situations, he's thinking for two now. It's sweet and my beautiful ship hug each other comfortingly.

Joey asks if he knew Dawson would come for him and points out that it's the nature of best friends. Even if they don't hang out, they're a part of each other and they shouldn't pretend like they don't exist to each other.

Dawson is watching them walk off together happily and Mitch comes up to enrage me. Why do you do this to me after such a sweet scene, show? Mitch basically whines on behalf of his son how unfair it is that he saved the day and doesn't get the girl. THAT'S NOT HOW IT WORKS!!! You don't get the girl as a prize for doing the right thing because she's a person with her own set of feelings and thoughts and she was out there helping him so WHY would she owe him anything other than a bit of gratitude? I hate this so much. But Mitch claims he got something more important, he can look back on this moment and know he did a great thing and no one can take that away from him. Yeah, ok. Dawson did a great thing in a sea of crappy ones. Give him a gold star, I guess.

Jen is impressed with Grams' attitude towards Mr. Brooks but Grams is too distraught for Jen's sarcasm and jokes. She breaks down because she thought she was never going to see her again and this is a beautiful scene, you guys. Grams bemoans all her preaching of faith when she lost it all when she really needed it. Jen says that it's probably because she lent it to her because she needed it most. Grams asks if she'd be willing to join her for church on Sunday and even though Jen looks less than thrilled, she agrees to try. I'm not much for religion but I am super for these two bonding and gaining strength from each other.

Jen walks into the yacht club and runs into Drew and they supposedly know each other. Jen is less than thrilled to see him but Drew is very stoked to have her around.

The next day, Pacey shows up at the Leerys to thank Dawson for rescuing him. Dawson says it isn't necessary because Pacey would have done the same thing. Pacey thanks him anyway but then adds that he is really sorry for how everything went down in the Spring and causing him pain and that he ruined their friendship because he misses it. He hopes that someday they might be friends again. Dawson looks almost pissed the fuck off that his excuse of Pacey never apologizing to him is now invalid and he can't be irrationally mad at him and only him anymore. He accepts his apology but basically lets it be known that they aren't going to be friends any time soon. Pacey walks off dejectedly and Dawson goes back to his yard work.

Fuck, he apologized. Now I can't play the victim
(But I'm still gonna)

I love how Dawson's one excuse to still be mad at Pacey and not Joey was because he supposedly never apologized, even though he did several times when Dawson first found out, and now that's null and void. I get that he's allowed to feel whatever way about Pacephine and he in no way has to be happy about it because obviously he's going to have some complicated feelings about it but the way he vilifies his friends over simply falling for each other and holds it over their heads is really gross.

I still feel like this show is grasping at straws for a direction this season. They have no idea where to go with anything and it's really showing these last few episodes. I'm amused for the most part still and I know that Mr. Brooks is going to come into play since one major story arc is Dawson helping him out to pay back for the boat and also regaining his love for film or whatever but I'm not looking forward to that because it's Dawson heavy and I'm just not interested. I cannot wait for the more Jen heavy stuff because I know that's coming this season and I remember Michelle Williams knocking it out of the park as she's clearly the strongest actor on this show. We'll see how everything progresses next episode which I have even less memory of, Future Tense.