Dawson's Creek - 513 - Something Wilder

 Original air date: January 30, 2002

Last week we almost lost Pacey and Jack started to do something more interesting in his frat life, but weirdest of all, Dawson matured? I'm as flabbergasted as the rest of you but let's check back in with how our gang is doing, shall we?

The episode opens with Jen attempting to lead Dawson blindly to a surprise. Dawson stubs his toe in the process but is a good sport about it until she tells him to open his eyes and he finds nothing on the counter in front of him thus rendering the 'no peeking' game pointless. Nevertheless, he lets Jen continue with her gift giving process and she unveils a bunch of back to school goodies for Dawson's very first day of film school, Boston Edition. Her piece de resistance is an ET trapper keeper and honestly, I just want to burn it to the ground because that thing traumatized me as a kid. It's a sweet gesture though and she's so excited about it and explained how she wanted to put Reese's Pieces in the pockets but thought that would be going too far. Dawson thanks her and they talk about how he's only taking three courses. They say their goodbyes as they each have places to be but agree to meet up for lunch and Jen is just all giggles and freaking adorable. 

I couldn't not post a pic of Jen being so happy

Joey and Elliot are sitting on her bed, discussing Wilder's book. Joey thinks it's great but Elliot thinks it's all smut and no substance. It's a fictional book that doesn't exist and I have no way of knowing one way or the other but I feel like I would agree with Elliot based solely on the facts that 1) I dislike Professor Wilder and 2) Wilder has to assign it to his class to get anyone to read it and is using his clout as a teacher to make people think its good. I am 100% biased but also I don't think I'm off on my estimations here. Elliot pivots to asking Joey out for a date on Friday to which she readily agrees and this is nice. They're pretty cute but actual functional relationships rarely work out and so my instinct is to feel really bad for Elliot right now. Audrey bursts into the room and is disappointed to not find them making out. Elliot leaves which is Audrey's cue to tease Joey about having a boyfriend. Joey says they're not going out, they're just getting to know each other and it really is irritating me that they keep saying he's a nice guy. I know I've said that and I'm realizing it's probably because the show keeps pushing that thought down our throats and I'm bracing myself because based on this show's history, I know the angle they're pushing here and I hate it.

Jen has shown up to the Frat house and all the guys have noticed her. I mean, she's gorgeous so of course they would. She's uncomfortable and tells Jack that he really should start forwarding his mail to his new address so she doesn't have to drop stuff off here for him. She hands him his mail, pointing to a letter that looks pretty important. Jack takes a brief look at it, scoffs and asks if she wants to play pool. Jen has read it though and calls him out for being on academic probation. Jack is not at all freaked out by this because he only failed a few and will make it up. Jen insists it's a big deal, because it is, but Jack brushes her off and continues playing pool so she leaves. 

Ok, Jack's attitude here, really rubs me the wrong way. First off, failing a few classes isn't something you "make up" like in high school. In college, if you've failed a class, you have to retake it and to retake it, you have to pay more money. I know Jack comes from a rich family but I thought they'd lost most of their wealth, the tv version of that anyway, so this should be a big deal to him. Second, I don't know where they're trying to go with this story. I mean, drama, of course but are we supposed to sympathize with Jack here? Because his not caring makes me kind of hate him. Wait, is Jack the new Dawson??

Dawson is taking in the vibes at his new campus when he's recognized by Oliver the weird film guy from the New Hampshire episode. He runs up and immediately starts telling Dawson about everyone very loudly and Dawson is just awkwardly saying hello to people as they glare at Oliver. I kind of love this scene because he's doing the explain the logistics of the school to the new kid trope seen in countless teen movies and shows but everyone who's being described actually hears it because it's "real life" and they're not impressed. Dawson wants to distance himself before he's completely socially ostracized and says he'll introduce himself around. Not a good start to his first day.

Jen is at her radio station job, now as a romantic advice person. Audrey calls in, giving her full name because she does not give a fuck and I love her for it. Instead of giving the pithy advice on sex and love that Jen got the job for, Jen is now all about the love and romance. It's sweet how after last episode, she has just gone all in on her relationship. She's so happy and I love to see it, so how is the show going to screw that up for her? Audrey is displeased with the love and sunshine advice and hangs up so Jen goes to caller 2.

Back at the frat, Jack is playing "mud football" with the guys and invites Blossom to join them. Blossom is curious about the blonde who came in earlier and Jack tells him that she's a buzzkill and is taken. He then admits that they were fighting about the fact that he's on academic probation and to literally no one but Jack's shock, Blossom isn't impressed by this. He demands Jack get his grades up because it looks bad for their frat if one of their new pledges flunks out the first year. Jack insists he'll make it up this term and Blossom says he'd better and tells him he should be studying instead of playing football. Again, it seems like we're supposed to be siding with Jack but like, Blossom is 100% right here. It's not cool to flunk out from college and he should get his grades up because guess what, Jack? If you flunk out of college you can't be in a Frat. What did Jack think would happen here? 

Dawson is sitting in class with Oliver and notices his script. He offers to read it for him but Oliver wants him to direct it. Dawson isn't sure because he wanted to take things slow, not jump into a big project but Oliver insists he read it and they'll talk later. Oliver also tells him his trapper keeper is awesome.

Joey is walking to class when Elliot pops up and asks her how she feels about Indian food for their date on Friday night. Indian food is delicious and if Joey has a problem with it, I'll go with Elliot to get curry and nan. Joey says she'll keep him posted when Wilder also pops up and tells them they're late for his class. Elliot rushes off but Wilder holds Joey back. Little predatory but that's nothing new for Wilder. He tells her that their big Lazare project is done and he's taking the whole team out to dinner to celebrate, Friday night. Joey agrees that she'll be there and only after realizes that she's double booked herself.

Jen asks Dawson about Oliver's script and he admits that he likes it but has some notes. Jen is excited but Dawson doesn't want to commit to such a huge project right now, especially one that isn't his. Jen is the ever supportive girlfriend and tells him that he has a twinkle in his eye and that he should at least talk to Oliver about the script before he makes up his mind fully not to do it. They make plans to go to lunch together before Jen leaves to talk to her producers before her show. It's funny, they're really pushing Jen and the radio thing, you almost forget it's not her career and she's still in college. 

Pacey is waiting impatiently for Audrey to finish her yoga session so they can carpool to the restaurant but Audrey doesn't want to go until they've helped Joey with her dilemma. Joey tries to get Audrey to shut up but she's spilled the beans that Joey has double booked herself. Audrey tells Pacey about the "nice guy" and the professor and I really hate that they brush aside the teacher stuff that happened to Pacey. In fact they just have him say that he's been there and done that and it's good. Why are we side stepping the obvious fact that teachers pursuing their students is just not ok and extremely predatory? The show being this flippant about it and framing it this way makes it seem like teens do want this and I don't think it's true and opens the doors for predators to capitalize. This is a dangerous message to send to young viewers and I don't like it. Joey is a smart girl but she will always feel inferior to her professor who is in that position of authority over her. They are not equals, so even though they are both adults, they are not in the same frame of mind. She's always going to look to him for answers and guidance and he can use that to his advantage. Stop encouraging this. I've already said my piece about Pacey and Tamara, the child rapist. Yes, I can call her that because Pacey was 15 when they hooked up. Look up pictures of actual 15 year olds and tell me they are not children. 

Anyway, Audrey says that if Joey wants nothing to happen with her professor and it's just a get together then there is no reason for her to cancel on Elliot. Which is insanely true. Just tell the professor that you already had plans or tell Elliot you'll meet him after the academic dinner. Joey agrees because she says that she's ready to date.

Jack walks up to the Frat house to find them lounging on the lawn. Blossom cheerfully asks him how his class went and Jack shows off the A he got on the quiz. Blossom congratulates him but Jack is all pissy about the fact that he got on his back about his grades. Blossom explains that he took it wrong and suggests they go to the bar to celebrate Jack's good news and off they go to tell the others but Jack still looks annoyed. 

At film school, a girl gives Dawson a look for his baby boy trapper keeper and he explains it was a gift but she doesn't look convinced. Dawson the ET lover is going to follow him through out his entire film school tenure and that's hilarious to me. Oliver asks about his script and Dawson mentions that he read it so Oliver launches into shooting schedules. Dawson has to slow him down to tell him he doesn't want to direct but Oliver insists that he has to direct it. I like that Dawson has a film friend again but I have to say, I preferred Nikki Wood putting him in his place and giving him tips on improving himself to Oliver's sycophantic lap dog routine. Like, slow your role Oliver, Dawson made one good documentary out of sheer luck of knowing a super interesting film director. He also made his romance with Joey into a bash fest and a Blaire Witch knock off. As well as a Creature from the Black Lagoon knock off. He's not that great, he's your age, you're both in the same film school, chill the fuck out. Anyway, Dawson has notes which gets Oliver excited like Dawson has bestowed him with a gift from the gods. Huh, I guess I can still be a little snarky when it comes to Dawson even if he has improved this season. I'm back, baby! Anyway, he wants to go over the notes at lunch and barely listens when Dawson tells him he has plans with his girlfriend.

Jen is hanging out with Pacey while he works, which means she's in the kitchen, which means she is a health code violation but they gloss over this with a quick remark about how Pacey will get in trouble if Danny catches them. Jen complains that her produces think her shows have been terrible this week and that she's lost her edge. If she doesn't get ratings back up, she's cancelled. It's funny, I always assumed she was working at the college radio station which is a role usually reserved for Communications majors and they don't really care about numbers because it's really just a way for students to practice being on air, perfecting their radio voice and all that stuff. This really makes it sound like it's her job or career which is a bit confusing but oh well. Jen realizes that she did the show before really finalizing things with Dawson. Pacey thinks people don't like happy people and that's sad but kind of true. She wants Pacey to help her bring her back to her sarcastic and edgy self and Pacey is ready to oblige but she gets a call from Dawson. Pacey thinks she's so fired.

A double whammy of Jen looking so happy and
Pacey looking adorable as he warns her she's so fired.

Joey is about to call someone, presumably Elliot, when he actually shows up at her door. He asks if it's ok if he came at 7 instead of 7:30 and she says it's fine but actually she was going to call because *cough cough* she thinks she's coming down with something. Honestly? My heart kind of breaks for Elliot here. They really seemed like they were going to be cute together and she's blowing him off for an academic thing and her stupid professor. She apologizes for cancelling so last minute but she wanted to see how she felt because she really wanted to go. He understands and tells her to get plenty of rest. Poor guy. You see what this show is saying right? Because he's a "nice guy" he doesn't get the girl? I hate that narrative. Absolutely girls would want a sweet guy like Elliot, who is considerate and kind. The only nice guy that girls don't want are NiceGuytms because they are usually not nice at all and secretly more misogynistic than the supposed Chads they've conditioned themselves to envy. Anyway, Joey lays down on her bed guiltily.

Jen is sitting on Dawson's bed reading Penthouse magazines. Magazines were a much bigger thing back in the day that gave you those stupid quizzes that told you your personalities. Now people use social media for that stuff. Anyway, Dawson says they aren't his but Jen knows because she got them to do research to get her groove back. Jen says she's going to lose her show because she's happy and boring now because of him and Dawson doesn't know how to respond so he tells her she looks cute with a Penthouse on her lap. Jen says they have a big problem but Dawson has another one, Oliver wants to join them for dinner. Jen is not pleased because he already spent all day with Oliver but Dawson has more notes they want to go over. Jen gets a little excited that he's going to do the movie but Dawson says he isn't so Jen is now confused as to why they have to have dinner with Oliver. Dawson says he doesn't and that he doesn't have to come but Jen says he can and Oliver immediately enters the room saying he told Dawson she'd be fine with it. Look, I've seen The OC, you never trust an Oliver in a relationship, that spells doom. They always break up the stable couple. 

Apparently, the bar the Frat bros wanted to go to was at Civilization? Which is the fancy restaurant Pacey works at and doesn't seem at all to be a college bar vibe. I mean, they serve Foix Gras, does that sound like a college bar atmosphere to you? I get it, they wanted Pacey to be here but it just doesn't make sense that this is where they'd go to drink. Jack is sitting by himself because he's a big whiny baby about having to do his school work. I am beyond confused with how this show is framing this story. Because on the one hand, it seemed like they were showing a downward spiral for Jack this season but on the other, they seem to be implying that it's the Frat bros fault? Eric ribs Jack for being a bit stupid because he got put on academic probation and like, yeah that is a thing that guys would rib him for because it's just not cool to flunk out in college. It's not. You're wasting your money and taking up a spot that someone might have wanted and taken more seriously. Jack is pissy because he thinks the brotherhood is conditional now and yeah, it really, really is. I don't know why he didn't get this, it's literally a private club where members are selected based on whatever criteria the members decide they're looking for. Why is he surprised that if he doesn't meet that criteria, he's out? He asks the waitress for another drink and thus begins his dark turn.

The students are leaving the restaurant with Wilder and he proudly boasts that he gave them enough time for their Friday night fun by having dinner at 6. I'm now confused because Joey was supposed to go to dinner with Elliot who showed up at 7. How long was their dinner that she showed up after 7 and could still eat with them. Wouldn't they be wrapping up? Joey is, of course, heading back to the dorms and Wilder offers her his arm to walk her back. I don't know why he would think that's appropriate at all, that is a date thing to do, sir. Step away from your student. Joey insists how much she liked his book, especially the part about the girl. You know, that one part...about the girl. The girl. I don't know why that bugs me so much but it's just so bad. Couldn't give us anymore detail? It's a fictional book, no one can check if a specific scene exists, just make something up for her to comment on. Wilder bemoans how bad it is while Joey fawns over how great it is and the dynamic is just really bad right now. I don't like this, like he's using her to feed his ego. She even figured out which character he was and he's like what gave it away? Oh yeah, the bad writing. Womp womp. I hate this, if you can't tell.

Oliver and Dawson are spending all dinner arguing over the script while Jen tries to speak but is ignored and interrupted at every turn. She looks miserable and I feel for her. 

That was too brief because now we have to go back to Wilder and Joey. Joey likes the guy character but the girl character isn't how she pictured his wife at all. Wilder says he doesn't have a wife and Joey's like, you said you had a wife and kid but Wilder made them up because...he uses that bit to get out of things he doesn't want to do. Uhhh, major red flag here. Run, Joey, run. This guy is either lying about having a family or he's lying about not having one and that spells trouble. Joey asks if the girl character was real and she was (but how can you really trust a guy who lies about having a whole ass family?) and that he loved her but it didn't work out. She was crazy but that's not what you want when you get older. Joey asks him what he wants and he answers coffee and then asks her to get coffee with him. I don't like this at all. He's a lying liar who lies and he's weedling his way into Joey's life. 

Meanwhile, Dawson and Oliver are still arguing while Jen is getting silently more pissed. Finally, Oliver fires Dawson from the production but Dawson says he never agreed to do the film in the first place. 

Back with Wilder and Joey, he asks her about the boy she wrote the poem about at the beginning of the year and Joey admits that they're over because he met someone else. Joey complains that dating is hard and you never know if it's worth it. She also admits that she gets butterflies for the wrong kind of guys and not the nice ones that would be good for her. Ouch for Elliot. Wilder asks her who gives her butterflies and she says the wrong people and he says that hardly seems fair and then they kiss. Bleh. They awkwardly fumble away and he worries about going to prison but Joey thinks she was an accomplice and this is a terrible message to send because he's been manipulating her and he's the one in the position of power that should know better but whatever. They go their separate ways.

Blossom tries to get Jack involved with the partying but Jack isn't having it because they don't care about him and his troubles, unless it embarrasses the house. Yes, Jack, that's how Frats work. That's how college works. You are in charge of your grades and if you fail, of fucking course you're going to get kicked out of college and the Frat. Why did he think this was a no big deal thing? How is Jack making me side with Frat bros? Is Jack the new Dawson? Is he? In fairness, Blossom then makes a very homophobic comment about how he's getting emotional and that talking to Jack is like talking to a chick which is entirely gross and not cool and Jack has every right to be upset with them. Jack gets in Blossom's face and he tells him to get back, Eric also tells Jack to cool it and says Blossom was just kidding. Pacey then intervenes, pulling Jack back and offering to get him a cup of coffee. Jack is too pissed though and starts a fight. The Frat bros pull Blossom off while Pacey holds Jack back but Jack struggles free and manages to break some glass and cut up his hand. Pacey has to hold down Jack in order to wrap his hand up to help stop the bleeding. He tells Audrey to keep pressure on it while he goes to call for help. Is it weird that seeing Pacey handle this all so quickly is a turn on? Because he was a boss and I'm here for it.

Joey returns to her room to see a basket left at her doorstep by Elliot. It's full of get well soon stuff and medicine and she looks guilty as hell, as she should. Yeah, you suck, Joey.

Dawson goes to Jen to talk to her about how dinner last night went and how he feels bad for how he treated Oliver. He sees a lot of himself in Oliver which is pretty pretentious of self congratulatory of him but that's pretty normal for Dawson. Jen huffs a bit before Dawson finally asks if she's mad at him and duh. She vents about how annoying it was that he blew her off at lunch and then invited the guy for dinner with them where he treated her like a piece of arm candy and didn't listen to a thing she said. She also vents about Oliver totally wrote in the first sex scene as an excuse to see boobs and if he's that desperate he should just pay $20 for a lap dance and be done with it and then she realizes that she has the venom back. Dawson apologizes but Jen is super happy. She tells him she forgives him, kisses him and rushes out to her radio job leaving Dawson alone and super confused.

Dawson is as confused as me that he's done something right

Audrey is doing a headstand and super proud of how she's centered and balanced but Joey says that she kissed Wilder and dumped "nice guy" last night. Audrey falls and freaks out, asking for details. Joey says that she gave Elliot back his nyquil and says they weren't really dating anyway but she just stopped seeing him. I think that's super weird because she seemed really into him. Why did they bother introducing him only to have her go with Wilder? It's so weird it's like they just had to have her break someone's heart to get with someone else and it's weird. Joey admits she freaked out and ran off but wishes she'd kept kissing him. She laments that she's the same old person and wishes she could become someone completely different but Audrey points out that if she were they might not be friends. Audrey tells her that these opportunities are presenting themselves to Joey as she is and it's only up to her to just decide to seize them. Joey agrees and says Wilder was a really good kisser. 

Jen is back in her DJ booth and dolling out bitchy advice to the masses. One girl has called in saying her boyfriend wants her to only wear thong underwear and Jen offers her the options of dumping him or dumping him which is legit. Why do guys feel like they can tell their significant others how to dress? People dress for their own comfort and confidence and if you can't love them because they're not wearing something you find appealing then that's a you problem. Jen is awesome.

Jack walks into the restaurant and hands Pacey some money to cover any damages he caused. Pacey tells him he could have gotten him fired and asks him what the hell is up with him. He knows that Jack is terrified of being on academic probation but just won't admit it and doesn't know how he got there when he was just trying to have fun. Jack tries to waffle about his situation but Pacey also lays out the truth about his new friend group and the way they treat him. I'm on board for most of that because they did kind of treat him like the token gay, as soon as Jack got upset they threw that othering fact in his face too, but I don't think they were wrong to call Jack out for being on academic probation. That's the thing, this was supposed to be this driving incident to prove how much the Frat sucks because they got mad at him but they had every right to be. Frats are about image so of course you have to live by a certain standard to be in one. Also, Jack was the one to really start the fight but Pacey is right that they all just ditched him there when he was bleeding out. Pacey asks Jack if it's all worth it to be part of this Frat life and Jack looks a bit sick and says he has to go. 

Dawson talks to Oliver about "that one scene" but Oliver has already cut it out because he somehow knew exactly what "one scene" Dawson was talking about. The vague talk about stories in this show drives me insane. Anyway, Dawson makes up with Oliver and agrees to direct his film. Oliver then drops the bombshell of why he can't direct his own film and it's because he wants to play the lead part. He walks off while Dawson gets oh shit, what have I signed on to? face. 

And again, I'm hooked and want to find out what happens next. Fuck this season is actually genuinely good and I'm floored because I remembered the college years being a mess. I mean, it's coming, don't worry, it's coming but in the meantime, things have been genuinely well written and enjoyable. Dawson is weirdly likable despite still having a bit of his egocentric, I'm the best filmmaker to grace any school I go to attitude, and Jen is freaking adorable. I may not like Joey getting with Wilder but it's at least interesting. Pacey being a cook somehow works really well. The only downside is Jack becoming the new Dawson, acting like everyone around him is the problem when it's really him but I'm still interested to see where his story takes him. Next week's episode is Guerilla Filmmaking and I'm actually really excited to see what this film is going to look like. Stay tuned.