Dawson's Creek - 417 - Admissions

 Original air date: April 11, 2001

We are diving back into the Creek again after another summer hiatus. My apologies, summer is just a hectic time to get any writing done and life is a mess right now. I feel like I'm being torn in every direction right now but I can always come back to this show and slip into the nostalgic simplicity of life. Come along with me, the water's fine.

We ended last episode with a bit of a heartbreak for the good ship, Pacephine. This episodes begins with Jen lugging a bunch of books into the cafeteria. Joey waves her over and marvels at the amount of colleges Jen got into, five to be exact. Jen chalks it up to her bestie, Jack and asks Joey if she's heard from any of her choices. Joey has not and fears she's doomed to a life of serving drinks to rich people. However, a note comes from the school office to give her home a call.

Jack and Dawson are in class together and Dawson gets the same kind of message that Joey got. Jack is pretty certain it's a sign since the great Dawson could never be in trouble or anything like that (Please ignore the entire episode of The Unusual Suspects, Dawson never gets called to the principal's office, this episode swears it). 

At the administrators office, both Joey and Dawson arrive to make their phone calls. Joey clearly gets great news because of the smile on her face but it appears as though Dawson is rejected which means that I get to use these gifs again and I'm not even sorry.

This gif has given me such joy every time I use it

Dawson assures Joey that he's fine but Joey feels awful which I totally get. You want to celebrate but your friend is down so you also want to make them feel better and everything is complicated. Pacey shows up so Dawson splits but not before telling Joey to celebrate. Joey then tells Pacey that Dawson was rejected from NYU but she has been accepted to Worthington, that fictional Ivy League school that popped up out of nowhere that was hinted at in the beginning of the season, and the same one that Joey and Pacey attended the party for where he pumped her up to the admissions people. Pacey is stoked but Joey can't quite believe it so he ushers her out of the school so she can go home to see the letter, since classes are redundant at this point. Can I just say that even after hearing the crushing news that Joey lied to him telling Dawson that they'd slept together if he asked, Pacey is still being a top tier boyfriend?

Jack and Jen are poring over their choices which I kind of don't understand. I thought people researched schools before applying and had ones that they preferred over others so they'd already know which one they want to go to, right? Jack agrees with me and begs Jen to just agree that they're going to New York but Jen isn't so sure she wants to go back there.

Joey and Pacey get home to find Bodie rattling off a list of items for Bessie to buy because they are planning a celebratory BBQ for Joey getting into Worthington. It's a very sweet scene as the two proud surrogate parents give Joey hugs and accolades. Pacey explains that they're here because Joey can't quite process the news so they give her the letter to read herself. As we know, she got in but the look of absolute joy on Joey's face as she reads it is priceless.

Dawson's mother is giving Dawson pitying looks because he failed to get into N.Y.U. and he begs her to stop, assuring her that he's fine. He answers the door to find Gretchen, who starts making out with them as Gail watches awkwardly until they realize she's still there and stops. Gail isn't pissed though, she's happy Gretchen is here to help him not feel so bad about being rejected. Dawson tells her to leave it alone and she leaves. Gretchen asks how he's really holding up and he admits that he's feeling like crap because all his friends have been accepted to places and if he got rejected by N.Y.U. then there's no way he got into U.S.C. either. Gretchen tells him that his rejection to one place has no bearing on the other and that Mr. Brooks didn't go to film school and managed to make it in Hollywood. Dawson starts to feel better because he can use the money he got from Mr. Brooks to make his own movies that no one is going to watch because let's face it, they'll either be rip offs or another retelling of his break up with Joey. But hey, he's successfully cheered up so whatever.

Jen is at her therapists office and mentions that she and Jack are having a hard time deciding on a college to attend, mainly because he wants to go to New York and she doesn't. Tom figures out that it's not so much New York as the issue she's been avoiding, her parents. He asks her to remember the last conversation she had with them. She actually mentions her mother arriving for one episode last season but if you think you're finally going to get some answers vis-a-vis Eve, this show's response would be: "Eve? Who's Eve? I've never heard of an Eve before." 

Tom asks her to remember her last conversation with her father and she gets more defensive and claims she doesn't remember because she doesn't care. Tom points out that she might not want to remember because she cares so much and it may hold the answers to why she's nervous about going back to New York. Jen really wants to leave but Tom points out that maybe she should try to find out why this subject is so hard for her. 

Pacey is helping Bodie bring groceries in for the BBQ they are throwing for Joey. Joey wants to talk with Pacey about their relationship since she got into college but Pacey won't hear of it. Joey protests but he insists that today is only about celebrating her amazing accomplishment and not for serious depressing conversations. I think this is another one of those things I never paid attention to because I was swooning over him saying that Joey is his dream but is a nice set up for the heartbreak to come.

Joey has gotten a letter and opens it only to discover that her full ride isn't actually a full ride. Worthington is requesting that her family kick in $15,000 which they decidedly do not have. Her good mood is forgotten because now she's not sure she can go anyway, thanks to needing money. Yay, capitalism! Denying smart students a good college because of financial barriers!

Joey and Bessie argue with the woman at the bursar's office but they are not going to budge since technically the B&B turned a profit. They don't take into account expenses apparently, which is just another way the system is rigged against lower income families. This episode is kind of depressing. Joey wants to be mad but is more mad at herself for not applying for more scholarships. The Bursar woman suggests student loans which a lot of people do and Joey smartly says no because she doesn't want to start her life off $60,000 in debt. Student loans are such a scam, it's disgusting the amount of money large banks make off the back of students just trying to educate themselves and get better jobs which don't even pay that well anymore. They leave and head back home only to remember everyone is showing up for the BBQ. Bessie wants to send them home but Joey insists she not do that and not tell anyone about the fact that she can't go to Worthington.

Joey's poker face is not good though so pretty much everyone is going to know something is up.

Dawson greets Joey with a big "Congrats" cake which is obviously not the best thing right now but he doesn't know that. He tells her everyone else is out back debating about whether or not to go to New York but since they didn't want him, he couldn't help. Joey doesn't react and Dawson assures her he was just being self-deprecating and that she shouldn't feel bad for him. Joey realizes that she's not pulling off the "everything is ok" vibe and tries to slap a smile on her face. Dawson asks about the mix up Pacey told him about and Joey lies and says it all went great. 

Joey goes inside and tells Pacey the bad news and he tries his best to cheer her up but there's nothing you can say when someone achieves their dream and then loses it in the span of one day. He asks her what they should tell everyone but again Joey insists that they tell no one because she doesn't want them to feel sorry for her. 

The gang are still debating over New York but when Joey comes out, Jen holds a quick toast for her which is very sweet. Jack tries to drag her into the debate but Joey nopes out of it which Gretchen regrets not doing in the first place. Gretchen notices Pacey and excuses herself to go talk to him. Jen and Jack are still debating over New York, Jen telling him it sucks while Jack says that's bull since she did nothing but talk it up to him for the past 2 years. Jen leaves to get a burger, even though she doesn't eat them.

Gretchen talks to Pacey who tries to avoid the topic of his future, much as Gretchen tries to tell him he's not the fuckup he believes he is. He then admits that Joey didn't get funding to go to Worthington and that he's kind of happy about it which makes him feel like shit. Again, nice foreshadowing that I missed in my hormonal teen years. 

Jack asks Jen what's really up with her not going and Jen admits that she feels there's nothing there for her anymore. Jack presses her further and she admits she's scared to go back. He relents and says it's more important to him that they go to school together (which is really sweet) but he encourages her to open up and heal this wound that's been festering in her for years. They banter about it but they are best friends through and through. I love their friendship so hard, you guys. 

Outside, Dawson finds Joey just as his parents show up and hand him a big, fat envelope. I'm assuming it's from USC and it turns out he got accepted. He and his parents are thrilled and even Pacey gets up to shake his hand and congratulate him because he's the best. Dawson refusing to forgive him is still the shittiest thing but the show seems to be forgetting about that. Joey runs off because seeing her friend get his dream and obviously get to go because he comes from a very privileged home, is too crushing for her right now. 

She's holding together so well, I'm sure Dawson doesn't suspect a thing...

Dawson finds Joey sobbing her eyes out inside and asks her what's wrong. She tries to play it off like it's nothing because everyone sobs at a celebration for their accomplishments...wait. Dawson sees through it and gets her to confess that she didn't get enough money to go to Worthington. She has to come up with $15,000 or her dream is dead and she can't get that kind of money together so her dream is definitely deceased. Dawson thinks it's stupid for money to be the cause of her dream's death and thus offers to give her some of Mr. Brooks' money so she can go to Worthington. Joey won't have it but Dawson insists she consider the possibility because she's worked too hard for this not to happen. It's the first truly selfless thing I think I've ever seen Dawson do and it's honestly impressive. 

Joey goes to Dawson's room where she sees all the pictures of him and his friends on the walls...except for her. Dawson comes in and mentions this fact and that they should fix it. Joey thanks him for the offer of money but has already decided against it because it's too big a sum and might come between them. Dawson insists that if their friendship survived last summer then it can survive this but Joey is certain that it won't and she'd be pretty right. Money can ruin friendships or any relationship really. It's not a good idea to loan to friends. I had to learn this the hard way but yeah, just don't do it, kids. Dawson is upset that she won't even consider it but Joey says she has and asks him to just let her say thanks and go. 

We next go back to therapy with Jen where Tom Frost awkwardly tells Jen that therapy was designed to include a minimum of 4 session a week which feels like the writers telling off critics complaining that Jen seems to go so much but also no one but the wealthiest people could afford that. Holy cow. I don't think I've encountered anywhere that offers that kind of service unless you go into private practices and I assume, that's well out of my price range. Would it be helpful? Of fucking course it would but wow do not enough people have access to that kind of care. Tom Frost has admitted to the failures of mental health treatment because the minimum is out of most people's reach. I'm sorry for that rant but I just couldn't with that line. It was so out of place but wholly depressing.

On to the actual plot, Jen says she's ready to talk about her parents, her dad specifically but can't remember her last conversation with him and she feels like she's going to cry. Tom reassures her and suggests she try to seek out someone who might have been there with her to help fill in the blanks. 

Dawson goes over to Pacey's house and asks him to help convince Joey that she should take his money. Pacey is not super on board but Dawson expresses how hard Joey has worked for this and that he can't stand to see her lose it all just because of money. Get used to that, Dawson. That is all our lives right now. Pacey agrees he couldn't see Joey being happy anywhere other than Worthington.

Jen goes to Drew because apparently he was there the night she last talked to her father. This is not going to go super well for her because as discussed numerous times, say it with me now: Drew is the fucking worst. He makes a joke about them having sex and her mother joining in before Jen finally realizes that he's going to be of no help to her and tells him off. For his part, Drew looks a little guilty but he's still the worst. 

Pacey and Joey discuss her future and she figures she can defer a year, work a little longer and then declare herself financially independent and apply for student aid again. Pacey won't hear it because a year is never just a year there and things could totally get in the way. He asks her what she wants and we cut to the next scene. 

Drew finds Jen to finally tell her about what happened that night and to no one's shock, he's just a gigantic NiceGuytm which is why he got mad at her asking about it. Apparently, Jen was drunk and asked him to come to her place which shocked him because she'd already told him about being caught with Billy but he went anyway. She knew he liked her but he knew she wasn't that into it when they started making out. Her parents came home and her dad was furious. Apparently, he called her a slut and Jen called him a hypocrite and then her dad kicked Drew out. Jen asks if he heard what they were fighting about but he didn't, he only knew it had nothing to do with him. He has the gall to make it about his pain which I side eye him for but I'll give him a slight pass since he has no idea why she's asking and through his eyes, she was definitely leading him on just to piss off her father and it's valid he feels used. I still hate him though. Jen apologizes for using him and he accepts so I guess they've kind of made amends? I wish they'd done more with this dynamic between them. They haven't had much screen time together since Andie OD'd and he was mostly relegated to being Joey's nemesis and trying to screw up her relationship with Pacey which makes zero sense but whatever.

Joey is standing outside Dawson's room when he finally spots her and anticipates her saying no once again to the money but instead, she's here to confess. She tells him that when he asked her the personal question at the movies, they'd just spent time together and things felt normal between them again and so she lied because she didn't think he'd understand but she admits that she did sleep with Pacey on the ski trip. Dawson is pissed that she lied and Joey apologizes for hurting him even though she never wanted to. Dawson doesn't look like he believes her so she leaves. 

Jen tells Frost what little she managed to find out and is frustrated that she doesn't know what they were fighting about but not surprised that they were fighting. Her relationship with her father does not sound great and oh boy is it ever going to get worse. Frost tells her that she'll remember when she's ready to but that it's not to find another reason to hate her parents but to discover a reason to stop hating herself. She's definitely crying out for help, anyone could guess that from her losing her virginity in her parent's bed at 12 years old, and drinking and doing drugs in her teens but that she has to figure out why she's doing those things to be able to try to stop. I feel like I'm going to need a lot of tissues for this story. I mean, I really don't like Frost, something about him rubs me the wrong way even though I know he's supposed to be good, it's just he's not an appealing character. However, everything we're learning about Jen is fascinating and it helps that Michelle Williams is an amazing actress, even at this age. She knocks drama out of the park and as much as I hate how much Jen gets shit on in this show, it's probably because the writers knew she was capable of just nailing anything they threw at her. I can't begrudge them that, she's great but I'm still a little salty at how little happiness Jen gets. 

Look, Michelle is an amazing actress and she nails this troubled and
haunted look but can Jen please have some happiness in her life? #JusticeForJen

Joey talks to Pacey and tells him that she finally told Dawson about them and apologizes to him about lying about it in the first place. Finally. Pacey also admits to her what he told Gretchen but that the reason it made him happy was that it finally felt like he wasn't the one holding her back from her dreams, it was something else and that took a lot of weight off his shoulders. He then asks her to promise that the moment he starts to hold her back, she'll cut him loose. Joey promises him that she won't promise that because she can't let him go. Oof. 

Jack finds Jen staring at a goldfish in a bowl and asks her what's up. She tells him that it's a memory trick, kind of like self-hypnosis so that she can remember things she chose to forget. Jack thinks she might actually be crazy but only since she's started being in therapy did he notice. She asks him if he wants to go to New York so Jack relents and watches the fish with her in silence. 

Dawson is waiting outside Joey's house this time and she's surprised to see him, considering she just told him about the whole sleeping with Pacey thing. It seems that Dawson has grown a bit this season and is not letting his bruised ego get in the way of doing the right thing. He gives her an envelope with a cheque in it and insists she take it because their friendship means more than anything to him. They hug and I'm floored that Dawson, of all people, did a selfless thing. I mean, you know Joey confessed to him because she thought he'd never give her the money if he knew she'd slept with Pacey and he just defied both our expectations so kudos to Dawson. Growth, you love to see it.

Next up, we have Eastern Standard Time and I'm getting so excited because we are getting ever closer to the most bonkers stuff in the college years, I'm telling you. I know I keep teasing this but you don't understand, it's just so dumb but awesome and I kind of love it. I can't wait for the college years, especially since this season is shaping up to be pretty damn depressing.