Glee - 201 - Audition

Original air date: September 21, 2010

We're just going to jump right into this one because there's going to be a lot to cover, apologies in advance. We start the episode after a long hiatus from our beloved show with the worst side character ever created, Jacob Ben Israel greeting us. He went under my radar at this point in my first watch but the incident this season soured me on him forever and this rewatch has only made me realize he was trash from the start. Anyway, he's interviewing the members of the glee club about how they spent their summer while being awful because that's his brand and he starts with Rachel, asking her if the rumours that she's difficult to work with are true and oooooofff. Already I have to address the elephant in the room.

Last week or so (my concept of time is just permanently warped at this point), Lea Michele tweeted her support of Black Lives Matter. This is a good thing and we all should support the movement right now, however, one of her costars (someone that we won't get to meet on this blog until we get to season 6) Samantha Ware, accused her of being extremely racist and exclusionary towards her on set so this joke is not aging well for her at all. It's always been known that Rachel Berry is very heavily inspired by Lea Michele, her drive and ambition, being self-involved and it's entertaining to see on screen but a very different story when you hear how that attitude affected others. If what she said to Samantha Ware is true, and I see no reason why she'd lie about this after all this time, it's decidedly not harmless or entertaining. I've got more to say but honestly this whole thing gets decidedly worse later so I'll save it for then.

Finn tries to defend her by saying she's a controlist which is not a word and she corrects him by saying she's controlling. This is all goofy fun in the show but after everything that's come out about Lea, it's a lot less fun to see the show being so cavalier about it. My second gripe is that Finn looks miserable and I get it, in this scene the joke is that he's the put-upon boyfriend of a highly needy girl but it rubs me the wrong way just how glum he looks when they also try to paint these two as an epic love story and "endgame". 

Jacob moves to his next target, Will Schuester who he rags on for picking dated songs for the glee club to sing and suddenly, I realize what this entire sequence is. Basically, Jacob is the audience conduit or worse, the writers way of acknowledging and yet mocking audience complaints. Glee is primarily for teens and a lot of teens watching the show wondered why most of the songs were not current ones that they'd recognize. (Curse those young 'uns because I liked the old song selections). If I want to hear current hits, I'll listen to the radio, thanks. I mean, if they get a new show, fine but guess what? Most of the songs you're gonna sing in high school show choir are going to be way older than current stuff because they're cheaper to buy so it was totally realistic that their songs were old, for the most part. That's my other little gripe. Also, for this show being written by a gay man, the fact that Jacob mocks his song choices both by calling them something "found on a drag queen's ipod" and as "100% gay" is very bizarre to me. 

Puck tells us he got a vasectomy over the summer to be responsible and not knock anyone else up but punches Jacob out when he asks if he's suffering from depression because he's not over Quinn. I don't like Puck but I'll allow this because I hate Jacob more. 

We find out Quinn is looking to start fresh after the whole pregnancy thing but Jacob is gross so he's focusing on Santana's breasts (which are supposedly bigger but I'm sorry, I didn't notice a change nor do I care to compare) while Brittany admits that she wasn't on a vacation over the summer as people thought but stuck in a sewer. 

Jacob then asks Mike and Tina if they're dating but they deny it and call him racist since it's just pairing the two Asian characters together (which a lot of people were shipping because of their dance when Artie sang Dream a Little Dream). They walk off holding hands while Artie watches sadly.

I'm pretty much done with this intro and sick of seeing Jacob's face but then he actually says something funny when he tells Will that there's a petition to stop him from rapping. This was definitely an actual complaint from the boards and it was funny to see it echoed on the show.

No one does, Will
Well, except my son who still asks to listen to Bust a Move
You got one, Will.

But then he ruins this small bit of charity by going into a quick montage of saying truly gross stuff to everyone and I just don't get what this character is for? He's terrible, is that the joke? Because it's not funny and shock humour never ages well. Kurt tells him off but then gets slushied by Azimio for his troubles, and called "lady" thus starting his arc for this season.

We finally get into the episode proper when Sue asks Will why he looks so glum. He's looking at an array of filled sign up sheets while his for New Directions remains empty. Sue points out that because he has no tryouts, people don't want to join because no one wants to join something that anyone could. This is false. There are always going to be people who sign up for their interests and singing is always an interest. There may not always be big groups that sign up but there will always be kids that want to join choir. But this show wants to push the fact that glee club is so marginalized that no one wants to join or something so go with it. Anyway, they are both supposed to meet with Figgins in his office so this should be good.

Apparently, Figgins wants to cut both their budgets which neither Will or Sue are happy with. Sue wants her confetti cannons, dammit. A woman chimes in that they need to draw in alumni donations and the best way to do that is to have a winning football team. Everyone is like who the eff is this? She introduces herself as Shannon Beiste, the new football coach. Will asks what happened to Coach Tanaka and Figgins tells him that he had a nervous breakdown which is kind of depressing. I think we only saw him in the first episode of the back 9 and he definitely mentioned depression. I didn't like Tanaka but I kind of hope he's ok which is weird because he doesn't exist. 

Sue then goes on to mock female football coaches and male nurses by saying they go against nature. I think I've matured out of this type of shock humour and I've gone over before why I don't like it. The joke is that Sue is saying awful stuff but like there is no clarification that what she's saying is garbage by anyone in the show so it kind of perpetuates the problem, you know? Anyway, Sue and Will now have a common enemy in Beiste.

Will lets the glee club know that everyone dislikes them. The kids don't care because they're family and they have fun which is the entire message of the show but that's not good enough because in order for this show to bring in MORE characters, they cut Matt Rutherford and are now down to 11 members when they need 12 to compete. Rachel agrees that they need to become a wall of sound because she saw how good Vocal Adrenaline was at Regionals and know they need to work hard to defeat them this year. Will says they are going to show the school how "down" they are and give them the song of the year, "New Directions style" while crossing his arms over his chest like the whitest Vanilla Ice ever. 

I think I'm going to have to declare this
the official Will Schuester gif

Cut to the club performing Empire State of Mind by Jay-Z and Alicia Keys in the schoolyard which is a fun performance. Rachel notices a girl mouthing along with the words while they sing and Finn notices a guy tapping his foot. They've locked on to their new recruits.

Will is pissed that after their super cool performance all they got were joke names on their sign up sheet which he says aren't even funny. Sue tells him not to be rude because she worked hard on those names but then coerces him to her side by saying that if their budgets get slashed more, he'll have to cut kids from the club anyway. Their common enemy is Coach Beiste. They decide to team up to topple her.

Finn is putting up glee posters in the football locker room when he overhears the guy who was tapping his foot in the schoolyard singing in the shower, as a call back to when Will overheard Finn singing in the shower in the pilot episode. This is decidedly the most uncomfortable way to discover someone's talent. He's singing Every Rose Has It's Thorn by Poison and Finn would've joined in but you know, the guy is naked and showering so not the best time. 

Rachel is putting up her glee posters in the girl's bathroom when she finds the girl mouthing along to their song in there. Ok, this is where things get uncomfortable again, given Lea's now very exposed behaviour of racial insensitivity and bullying but the following conversation happens:

RACHEL: Oh, hello! I couldn’t help but notice you admiring me yesterday in the courtyard.

SUNSHINE: Um, what?

RACHEL: Oh, you don’t speak English. (loudly): You like me sing! You like me sing very much!

SUNSHINE: Um, I totally speak English.

This girl is Filipino and this is decidedly not funny. Again, the joke is Rachel is being stupid but nothing is really done with it and so it just comes across as gross especially given the way she apparently talks to lower level cast members, especially those of colour. This entire exchange is uncomfortable and rather tone deaf and I think I hate it because even though the joke is that Rachel is being stupid, we're still expected to be on her side and laugh and speaking as a Rachel fan, NOPE. 

The girl's name is Sunshine Corazon and Rachel encourages her to sign up for glee club so she can sway in the background while Rachel sings solos. Sunshine is weirded out but then starts singing Telephone by Lady Gaga because that's what she's listening to. Rachel hears and gets this bizarre look on her face before joining in for the most uncomfortable looking duet since she sang Poker Face with her mother. Seriously, I don't know what vibe they're going for here but why is Rachel looking like she's threatening to kill Sunshine while she's just smiling away like they're having a good time. 

What was the direction here?
Ok, Lea, sing like you want to eat Sunshine's face off

Sue bursts in and tells them both to shut up which abruptly ends the song. Sunshine apparently had fun and wants to sign up but Rachel tells her she'll get back to her on when auditions are and not to tell anyone about their weird duet.

Next we cut to the football locker room where Coach Beiste announces that everyone is cut and has to try out again. No one is pleased and then a pizza delivery guy comes in for a delivery for her. Everyone snickers except for the boy who tapped his foot (Sam Evans but the show hasn't said his name yet) because he's a sweetheart. Outside the room Will and Sue are snickering like children and I kind of hate them both. Sue gleefully says they're childish but that the stunt will force Beiste to relive nightmarish childhood memories so she'll quit and their budgets will be restored. 

Inside the locker room, the pizza delivery guy informs Beiste that if she doesn't pay for them, he has to and he has no money so Beiste does the best thing and pays for them then gets Finn to hand them out to everyone who has to take four pieces each and then go out on the field. First person to puke is the first person to get cut. She then leaves the locker room where Will and Sue then pretend not to be listening at the door and Coach Beiste offers them some pizza too because she's a sweetheart and Will and Sue are garbage.

Then, the stupidest scene ever happens and I hate it so much. Ok, so Artie is begging Finn to help him get on the football team which is ridiculous on all levels. I'm not trying to denigrate him here, it's just a sport that would be hard for a person in a wheelchair to play, not to mention, dangerous for all players. The reason Artie wants on the team is because Tina dumped him for Mike Chang after they spent the summer together at Asian Camp. I'm not making that up, the glee writers did because they love using shock/slightly racist humour while providing no context. I also don't feel bad that Tina dumped Artie because he's a terrible boyfriend and even though she lied about stuttering, she deserves better than the way Artie treated her. The show even punctuates this point by showing the break up where Tina calls him out for being an awful boyfriend who ignored her for weeks in the summer and Artie's response was that he was "playing a marathon round of Halo, woman" So, yeah, Artie can suck it and be alone forever. 

Artie puts this idea in his head that Finn could charge down the field with him (assuming that he'd be able to get enough speed pushing a wheelchair across grass) and he'd be like a battering ram. Finn thinks this would be awesome because he's dumb and is immediately sold on the idea. I think we're supposed to be sold on it too but like, that sounds hella against the rules and dumb. I'm not on their side is what I'm saying. Anyway, Finn is sold but asks for Artie's help first.

They go up to Sam and ask him if he wants to talk about Glee club, then we cut to the choir room. Sam introduces himself to the rest of the guys of glee club and Puck instantly makes fun of him for having a big mouth, which is rude. Sam tosses one back though and Finn and Artie both like him though Artie mentions that his Bieber cut has to go (I agree but only because Sam looks much better when he does cut his hair). The guys ask him to audition on the spot which is not cool in real life but this is a show so of course he has a song in his pocket. He chooses Billionaire by Bruno Mars ft Travie Scott...er or is that the other way around? I remember people loved this song but I'm not a fan because it sounds just way too similar to Santeria by Sublime a song I do really love. The guys all have a blast singing it together and they invite Sam to the actual auditions. Poor Sam, having to basically audition twice.

Rachel approaches Kurt and Mercedes and tells them about Sunshine and how talented she is and that she's worried about their abilities to get solos. Look, in most highschools, if you're a freshman in choir, you ain't getting solos. That's reserved for seniors. At least, that's how it worked in my school and there was always a favourite. Rachel really shouldn't be worried and no disrespect to Sunshine who does have a nice voice, I just don't get why Rachel would be so threatened by her? It's not like she's that much better than any of the girls that are already in glee club so why is Sunshine seen as such a threat? Anyway, she tells them that she paid Azimio and Karofsky to brutally slushie them by Sunshine's locker to scare her off of joining glee. Mercedes tells her that her idea is awful and so is she. I fully agree, Rachel is not looking good this ep. Kurt says that he wants to beat Vocal Adrenaline and if Sunshine can help them, she's in. Rachel agrees to tell her when auditions are. We cut to her giving Sunshine an address.

Beiste is trying to find somewhere to sit in the teacher's lounge and you know, it's funny that both Will and Sue's tables are empty. Because they both suck and no one wants to sit with them. Sue turns Beiste away and so does Will and Beiste has had it. She tells him that she was told to watch out for Sue because she's a bully but was told that Will was cool but now she thinks they got the last part wrong. They definitely did, Will is the worst.

Beiste is crying in the men's locker room and I just want to give her a huge hug. Puck comes in and asks if she's crying and Coach Beiste tells him that she is because she saw their stats, trying to rib them and appear tough. Finn comes in at that moment with Artie and asks if he can try out and Beiste rightfully thinks he's messing with her. Finn tries to explain the dumb logic that Artie told him about centrifugal force but she's not having it and cuts him. She thinks he's trying to make her look like a monster by making her have to tell a kid in a wheelchair that he can't play and she's not wrong for being upset about that. Of course Artie can't play, at least not at this level and it's unfair of Finn not to recognize that and put her on the spot like this. Artie stammers that he really does want to play because he wants his girlfriend back and to have abs and Finn chimes in that he'd be like a human battering ram. He then calls her she's overreacting and calls her "dude". She throws him out at that point because she's so over the way this school is treating her and I can't blame her.

Sue is having Cheerios tryouts and Quinn has come in to try out. Sue tells her to get out until Quinn mentions that she'd be able to bring in donations from rich church goers. Sue says next, but Quinn looks like she got what she wanted so I assume this means she got back on the squad. Both Becky and Sue are shocked at who comes in next to try out. We cut to Sue telling Will about it who can't believe Finn is trying out for Cheerios. Finn does a horrible dance to I've Got the Power and then asks to be considered, Becky and Sue's eyes are burning. 

My eyes are burning too

In Figgins' office Will is arguing for Finn to be reinstated to the football team but Beiste isn't having it. Will argues that Finn was just helping his handicapable friend but come on, there was no way Artie could be on the football team. He's way too scrawny and he can't kick like Kurt could to make up for it. It was never going to happen. Will begs Beiste not to make a snap decision about Finn and she turns that back on him with regards to how he treated her. He begs her not to take her anger with him out on Finn but she leaves the office and she has every right to. Honestly, #TeamBeiste. 

Sue is meeting with Santana about her boob job and shames her for getting it done. I get that Sue is a bully and getting a breast augmentation in high school is a terrible idea and they wanted to deter kids from doing this but it feels really mean in the context of the show's universe where Santana is a vulnerable teenager and not an adult. This also smacks of Joss Whedon levels of bullying where a female cast member does something they disapprove of and proceed to punish them in the show. It's gross. Anyway, Santana is demoted to bottom of the pyramid while Quinn indeed gets to reclaim her title as head cheerleader. Santana is pissed.

Quinn triumphantly puts on her Cheerios uniform and does her hair in her signature ponytail. She walks down the hall in slo-mo relishing her regained shield and status when Santana attacks her and shoves her into the lockers. They both start fighting in the hallway and insulting each other. Brittany asks to stop the violence while doing nothing but Will comes in to split them up. So there is going to be more rivalry between Quinn and Santana this year, I guess.

At the auditions, Rachel is ready to pack it in since clearly no one is going to show up. Will says they are holding them from 3 to 5 and it's only 4:58. Finn is certain Sam is going to show up since he idolizes him. Sure he does, Sweetie. Kurt points out that Finn has lost his allure now that he's no longer quarterback. Mercedes asks about Sunshine and if Rachel gave her the address and Rachel says that she clearly didn't want to sing with a bunch of losers. 

In Figgins' office, he's asking Brittany where on the doll Coach Beiste touched her which is supposed to be funny but is really gross. I don't like this at all and I get that Sue is awful and the bad guy but wow is this way too far to get rid of someone you don't like and it kind of perpetuates the whole "women lie about sexual assault to get their way" myth which is doubly gross. Will comes in and asks what's going on so Sue fills him in, winking as if he'd be in on it. Will thankfully grows a pair and talks to Brittany about how a lie like this could ruin someone's life and she admits that she made it up and that actually, she really wants to touch Coach Beiste's boobs. 

Coach Beiste storms out because seriously, what garbage they have put her through this week and Will tries to go after her but is stopped by Sue. They have a brief argument but Mike and Tina interrupt to tell Will something. Sue storms off and tosses people down the stairs. How does she still have a job here?

Cut to Will confronting Rachel and asking her if it's true. Tina chimes in that she could have died and Rachel says that she didn't send her to an active crack house. Oh boy. So, in order for Sunshine not to try out, Rachel gave her the address of a crack house where she went instead of the auditorium. Rachel claims she did it for everyone because she didn't want new members but Tina knows what's up and that she didn't want to lose her control over solos. Will tells her to make it right.

Cut to Rachel approaching Sunshine and apologizing for sending her to the crack house. Sunshine says that they used her sheet music for toilet paper so, wait, Rachel lied and did send her to an active crack house? Dear god the writers really want us to hate all their characters, don't they? Rachel offers to buy her new sheet music and tells her she can pick it up at the auditions.

Cut to the audition and Sunshine is on stage. She is going to sing Listen from Dreamgirls. She sings, they all cheer and Will welcomes her to the club. Honestly, I'm still not wowed by her voice enough to view her as a threat to Rachel's solos but she's good. 

Will goes to sit with Coach Beiste in the staff room and apologizes for making her feel like an outsider when he should have been more welcoming. They shake hands and make amends. Sue then comes in and tries to offer her cookies but they smell like dog poop. Sue tries to pretend they don't and Will tells her to stop. Sue is outraged that he turned on her in public and vows to make both their lives miserable. 

Finn confronts Sam about not showing up for auditions and Sam admits that after what Coach Beiste did to him, he was scared off. I don't see why because she cut him for trying to bring Artie in not because of Glee but then he adds that everyone talks crap about glee club and that as the new guy, he's already an outsider. Finn understands and asks what position Sam got. Sam tells him he's the new quarterback. Oops.

Will goes to welcome Sunshine to the glee club by giving her the fall schedule but some dude tells him she won't be joining their club. Will asks if he's her dad but nope he's the new director for Vocal Adrenaline. Sunshine excitedly tells him that they also gave her and her mom a new condo and green cards. Will is confused how VA even found out about Sunshine and Sue comes in saying she made the call and that he should have gone along with her poop cookies. Then Sunshine drops some crazy truth on the situation that uncomfortably mirrors what has come out about Lea recently:

SUNSHINE: I actually would have stayed here, but I think Rachel would have made my life a living hell. I just didn’t trust her after she sent me to a crack house. Not cool. It was nice to meet you.

That's a little too close to what Samantha Ware complained about for me to find in any way amusing because apparently, that's exactly what would have happened. Sunshine was right to get the hell out of there.

Rachel asks Finn how mad everyone is and he said he talked them down from giving her a code red. Rachel then tells him that he should just dump her now but then he says that he's the loser and she should be dumping him but she says she'll never dump him. This is decidedly an unhealthy conversation, I mean, Finn is basically saying he's only with her because he feels like a loser. I don't see the romance here. Finn tells her to apologize to everyone and she agrees but wants some alone time first. She sings What I did For Love from A Chorus Line to close out the episode. She's all sad and I get this weird feeling that the writers assumed we'd still be on her side by the end of this because she's sad? 

I'm so sad because people hate me for sending a girl to a
crack house and almost getting her murdered just
because I didn't want to share the spotlight

From what I recall on the boards (which the show seemed to pay a lot of attention to for some reason and usually to the show's detriment) everyone was complaining about the addition of new characters when they already have so many they don't develop enough or give enough songs to and the fact that they got rid of a male PoC and replaced him with a white guy who would go on to get way more screen time and recognition is pretty gross even if I do like Sam. Anyway, I think they assumed from everyone's dissatisfaction with adding new characters that we'd be on board with this but no one wanted this, this was just mean. Honestly, this entire episode felt entirely mean spirited in a way that Glee never really was before or maybe they just turned it up too much to ignore or write away as dark comedy anymore. From open to finish this episode was like a tirade of bullying and microagressions to the point that it was almost unpleasant to watch. It's not helped by the timing of me rewatching this episode both in terms of racial tensions being very high and discovering just how bad Lea Michele's diva behaviour was. I mean, it's one thing to be like "oh, she's a diva and has to get her way" but the fact that she's a bully to her costars is really disheartening.

Though, I do have some thoughts on the situation. When I was reading Samantha Ware's full account of everything, one important and glaring thing stuck out to me. 

Ware says she never officially reported the alleged behavior to the network or studio because she had not considered, or even knew, that filing a complaint was an option. But Ware says Michele’s prima-donna behavior was no secret on the set.

“Lea’s actions were nothing new, so I guess since it was such a common thing, my case didn’t seem like that big of a deal,” Ware says. “I remember the first day I actually spoke up and unfortunately no one did anything. They just shrugged it off, like ‘That’s her.’ No one was stopping these things, which is an issue because the environment was helping perpetuate this abuse.”

It's no question that Lea Michele was terrible but I think the more glaring problem is the show runners. Ryan Murphy, Ian Brennan, and Brad Falchuk hold a lot of responsibility for how things were on their set. It's really troubling to me that Samantha wasn't aware that reporting the incident was even an option and if Lea's diva behaviour was well known, then the show's creators were well aware and just didn't care or do anything about it. Lea was terrible but it's the showrunner's/boss's job to make everyone feel safe on their set and they just didn't. They should have talked to her long ago about playing nice but they chose not to and that says a lot about how they view their actors, the less favourite ones. Given the fact that Lea has matured and reached out privately to apologize to everyone that came out about her, I'd say that maybe if the show runners had told her that her behaviour on set was unacceptable or hurting people, if they had given the other actors a voice then maybe the atmosphere on set would have been a hell of a lot better. People do not usually set out to be terrible, but they can't even consider change if they are sheltered from the fact that their actions have hurt people. Hopefully everyone is doing better than they did while they were on this show. 

This was a downer kick off to a new season and for that, I'm super sorry but the show did it to itself on this one. Hopefully next week will provide us with some more fun, it's a feature episode but at least the artist is Britney Spears who has some fun songs. Stay tuned for Britney/Brittany.