Original airdate: May 25, 2010
We're back to looking at Glee and I'm going to be perfectly honest with you guys, I'm not excited for this. I get that Lady Gaga is huge and people love her. People also love KISS but I'm a fan of neither and that's why I hate theme episodes so very much. There is exactly one theme episode I love and it's because Fleetwood Mac is amazing but if an artist isn't your bag and that's the artist being featured? It makes episodes very painful to sit through. Also, there is a severe lack of Groff and that makes me sad.
The episode starts with a nervous Tina in Figgins' office. She's worried she's in trouble but Will, who is in there with her for reasons, assures her that she's probably there to be commended for her excellent attendance record. Figgins quickly interjects that she is, in fact, in trouble because of her goth wear. Oh yeah, Tina's a goth. That was her character thing, wasn't it? Scary Goth? Now Shy Goth? He calls her Ms. Cohen-Chang and I'm not sure that her last name was ever mentioned before but like, did they not realize that they have only two Asian characters on this show and they gave them both the stereotypical last name Chang. Why is that the go-to for white writers? I'm looking at you too, JK Rowling (Cho Chang). There are so many Asian names out there, do some research instead of just lazily naming them all the same damn thing. Especially in the same damn show where the two characters aren't at all related. This is where I get uncomfortable with the "racist jokes" this show does because they're clearly just that little bit racist themselves. They're not comical bigots like they write in the shows but their that internalized racism variety where they don't see how harmful they're being. I hate it.
Where was I? Oh yeah, Figgins is chastising Tina for wearing goth outfits. This upsets Figgins because this episode aired around the time that Twilight fever was hitting its peak and he's apparently afraid of vampires. To illustrate this fact we see a group of students (Lauren Zises among them) dressed as vampires attacking Jacob Ben Israel. Did they kill him? Please? Because honestly, if we are rid of him instead of having to deal with the horror that is to come, I will welcome Twihards that randomly attack other students, especially if that student is Jacob Ben Israel. Good riddance.
So, the crisis this episode is that Tina is no longer allowed to dress like a goth or she'll be suspended. Slow down, show. You're going to give me a heart attack with how thrilling and engaging this conflict is.
Carole is leading Finn down some stairs because he's blindfolded. She's trying to surprise him but the surprise is that she's agreed to move in with the Hummel's and now Finn has to share a room with Kurt. That is a pretty crappy surprise for Finn and I'm honestly shocked they're all surprised with how badly he's taking this. Not cool. Kurt even has a shit-eating grin on his face about the whole thing so I guess we're back to him being conniving about getting his crush to move in with him and he's no longer upset about Burt and Finn hanging out? Is that what we're going with? More things to hate this episode. I'm honestly shocked that a gay man is in charge of this show because he is perpetuating a very damaging trope about predatory gay men and that is super not cool. Anyway, Burt gives Finn $300 to redecorate the room and to kind of bribe him into being ok with the sudden move but Kurt immediately yoinks the money from his hand and says he'll take care of redecorating so that he'll make the room a reflection of who he is and who he wants Finn to be.
At glee club, Tina has shown up in sweats and is decidedly unhappy about it. The other kids suggest some different looks she can try but she hates all of them because she is a goth girl, dammit and if she can't shop at Hot Topic, she'll die. Or something like that. Rachel bursts in because she's done some serious research into Vocal Adrenaline (how does Jesse feel about this? Didn't they just get back together? Where is he?) And she's found out they're doing a Lady Gaga number. The kids are all super bummed and ready to give up. Will has no idea who Lady Gaga is and Puck thinks she's a man. That was a big thing in the day, people saying she was a man and it's just rude. I may not be a big fan of her music but come on, don't make it about gender. Anyway, Will gets an incredibly unoriginal idea! They're going to help Tina find a new look and explore theatricality by...copying Vocal Adrenaline and doing Gaga. This is really close to that thing that you got mad at other glee instructors for doing when you were competing at Sectionals, Will. I mean, you're not flat out stealing set-lists but you are stealing act ideas from another group and you only knew they were doing it because one of your kids spied on them. Just because it wasn't directly you doing the spying, doesn't absolve you of guilt, Will Schuester. The girls are ecstatic about this but the boys are decidedly less so. I feel them.
At the Vocal Adrenaline auditorium, Rachel, Quinn, and Mercedes are sneaking in at the back to watch their rivals perform. Rachel claims that stealing their ideas is not a crime but like, the exact same thing happened to you at Sectionals and it definitely hurt, didn't it? All your work went out the window? Don't do to them what was done to you, this is so not cool. They watch Shelby coach the kids and explain to them what theatricality is. To showcase this, she performs Funny Girl by Barbara Streisand. Rachel is like that's totally what I would've done but when she hears Shelby's voice, she freezes. Here's a little thing that I like, they set up in Laryngitis that Rachel has a great ear for detecting voices and so it's believable that she'd immediately recognize Shelby's singing as the one from the tape she just listened to. That's a neat little detail and I like it. I have terrible recognition both visually and audibly. I can't pick a face out from a crowd to save my life and I sure as hell can't pick out voices unless they're very distinct. Kudos to her, I bow to everyone's superiority in this regard because I just can't and never will be able to.
Rachel confronts Shelby and tells her she's her daughter. They sit together in the bleachers to talk and it's very awkward. She asks how Rachel feels and Rachel tells a cute story about how her fathers would bring her water when she was sad and it got to the point that she didn't know if she was sad or just thirsty. Shelby immediately says she shouldn't have done this and backs out as quickly as she can. That was a whole lot of work for abso-fucking-lutely nothing. She tells Rachel she'll call but like, we know she's not going to call. Even Rachel does.
Finn enters Will's office and he's gushing about how amazing Lady Gaga is because well, she allowed Glee to use her musical library so they must stroke her ego, so to speak. Finn isn't interested because he's here to tell Will that, apart from Kurt, none of the guys are thrilled about doing Gaga. Will is like, oh gee, did I do that thing where I refuse to listen to you guys again? And Finn concurs but says he has an idea of what the guys could do for their theatricality assignment.
Quinn and Puck are having an argument about this baby again because he wants to name it Jack Daniels but she doesn't want to name it because she's not keeping it. Also, it's going to be a girl. Also, I guess Puck and Quinn are a thing again. Forget about Santana! Or Mercedes! Just forget everything and treat this episode as a stand alone because Glee sucks at continuity.
Tina is gushing to Kurt about how much she loves her "champagne bubbles" dress because it expresses a whole different side of her when Karofsky (the resident bully) and Azimio bash into her. Kurt stands up for her like a champ and then the bullies act like stereotypical tv bullies which is to say, they're not intimidating at all. They talk about how they're not "gaga for Gaga" which is so lame I cannot even.
Will congratulates the girls, and Kurt, for their fabulous Lady Gaga costumes which far surpass that of which most high schoolers are capable of both in terms of money and talent but whatever. Congrats to the costume designers because the costumes are fun. Rachel is missing and Quinn and Mercedes try to explain what happened. For some reason, Will now tries to act indignant that they're spying on their rivals but is also eager to find out what they found out. They explain to everyone that Shelby is Rachel's mom. Puck thinks that Rachel is going to jump ship to Vocal Adrenaline but Rachel comes in at that moment to say that she'd never do that. (Where is Jesse? Why is no one bringing him up? Did the writers forget he was supposed to be here? Hello? Continuity??? I'm scared.) At least Rachel's dress is cute and definitely suits her.
The dress is falling apart though because her dads don't know how to sew and stapled the frogs on. I would think they'd stay pretty well. Will doesn't want to talk about a student's obvious emotional turmoil though (unless they're Finn) and instructs the kids to sing. They're cured! They sing Bad Romance by Lady Gaga. It's alright.
Finn is in the boy's bathroom after the performance and he's putting on makeup. Cue Karofsky and Azimio springing out to talk about how much they just hate different things in very obvious language that tells me that whoever wrote this episode was definitely bullied by jocks. And they definitely thought in their heads that they were only picked on because of how special and different they were. I don't mean to armchair psycho-analyze but the message is just so clear here. They threaten to beat Finn up for being a jock and being into glee and equate it to being bisexual which is odd and not relevant but see above.
Rachel goes to see Shelby who tells her to stop sneaking into her rehearsals which is super legit. Rachel isn't there to spy though. She shows off her supposedly tragic (but I think is cute and actually looks like something a high schooler would be able to realistically, put together for school) outfit and says she really needs a mom right now. This show, for how diverse and open it claims to be, has some serious issues with classic gender roles. Why is that a mother's job, Glee? Hmmmmm???
Back at Glee Club, Rachel returns with a brand-new, less cute but more fashionable, outfit that her mother made her. She's very proud of this and the other kids approve. Now it's time for the guys to perform their theatrical song and of course, it's a KISS song, Shout it Out. Will is happy but is curious what their outfits say about them? It's other people's outfits, Will. They proceed to explain KISS lore where Mike doesn't get to talk and Matt has been relegated to "guy who replaces Artie's character when he quits" ouch. No love for Matt or Mike.
Kurt and Tina are talking after the performance when Karofsky and Azimio pop up. Look, I'm not Lady Gaga either but did she spit in these guys' faces or something? They seem to loathe her so much that they can't stand seeing anyone dressed as her, or it sends them into a violent rage. It's weird. I think they beat them up which, wow guys, talk about punching down. Do you feel like big men for punching a small guy and a girl?? Comically evil bad guys.
Kurt and Finn are in their room and he asks Finn to talk to Karofsky and Azimio. Finn lashes out because he's terrified of those two too which is kind of funny. Finn is this big jock and yet Kurt is the one who stood up easily to two bigger jocks. Finn is kind of a coward with no convictions. I get that he's just a boy though and it can be hard to stand up to guys like Karofsky and Azimio but it's just interesting to me that Kurt seems to be a lot braver, especially considering how future storylines go. Anyway, Finn is struggling to take his makeup off and Kurt tries to help him with a moist toilette. Finn is uncomfortable and pushes him away, opting to finish in the laundry room.
Will confronts Shelby about Rachel because he has decided that she's not as into the reunion as Rachel is. To be fair, Shelby says he's right but it's just funny that from Rachel saying she reconnected with Shelby he got that she wasn't into it. Shelby tells a sob story about how she can't have kids anymore and how she wanted a baby back but now can't have one and Rachel is an adult who doesn't need her. With how quickly this is being resolved so she doesn't have to show up again, it tells me that this was not at all the plan they had intended for this story and only threw it in there to appease the fan theory and demand for them to be mother and daughter. I can't prove this is the case but I can definitely speculate that this is what happened because this is just sloppy and just wait until you get to the finale.
Kurt is showing off their newly redesigned room to Finn and there are a lot of frills and shawls everywhere so Finn, of course, hates it. Kurt is offended because he worked really hard on it and like, you could have tried, I don't know-shot in the dark here but, maybe ASKING FINN FOR HIS OPINION BEFORE REDOING EVERYTHING?? They really wanted to make Kurt the victim here but honestly, I'm mostly on Finn's side and I hate Finn. Imagine having to move houses really suddenly, without being asked. Then you find out you have to share a room with someone who you have no interest in but clearly has an interest in you. Then they redecorate the space completely to their tastes, making you feel completely lost and probably unwelcome. Wouldn't you explode too? I really can't blame him.
Part of Finn's problem is the fact that Kurt is a guy who happens to be gay and the show really wants that to be the problem but I imagine it would be very uncomfortable to suddenly have to room with and get dressed in front of a stranger regardless of sexual orientation. That's a lot and it's very valid for him to want some privacy. However, then Finn starts throwing the word "f*ggy" around and that is not cool. Burt here's and stomps down like a champion to tell Finn off for that language. Kurt tries to brush it off but Burt won't hear it. He throws Finn out of the house because he won't tolerate that language under his roof, even if it costs him his relationship, his child comes first. Kurt, you best sit down and shut up from now on. I don't want to hear anything about how your dad isn't there for you anymore. This man is a saint and you will recognize his love for you or I will make you. #TeamBurt.
In Glee Club, Finn tries to apologize to Kurt but he won't hear it because now he gets to play victim despite being responsible for all of it, conniving to get his parents together, pushing them to move in so you could spend time with Finn, redecorating the room in the way you wanted without consulting Finn at all. I'm not saying what Finn said was right, I'm saying that Kurt needs to accept some responsibility for the mess he caused.
Puck saunters in because he has something to say to Quinn and he wants everyone to hear it. He apologizes for suggesting such a stupid name for the baby and tells her he understands that he's giving her up but that before she does, he thinks she should name her baby Beth, then he asks the guys help to sing a song for her. Hilariously, Finn also joins in which is weird considering the past drama there. They sing Beth by KISS. I am distracted through the whole performance by Quinn's ginormous eyelashes batting constantly and having a tear stuck in them.
Rachel and Shelby meet in the auditorium to talk. Shelby confesses what she said to Will and Rachel admits that she feels the same way (convenient) that there is no bond there. Instead of ignoring each other, they will just admire from afar for now. Shelby then gifts Rachel with a cup for her water that has gold stars on it. That's kind of sweet and of course gold stars are her thing, they're Rachel's thing too. Rachel asks if she'll sing a duet with her before they part ways and Shelby readily agrees. Rachel commands Brad the piano guy to come out and mentions that he's just always here and...wait.
Who is Brad? Where does he come from? Why is he always just around? Does he sleep in the auditorium, waiting for the kids to ask him to hit it? Is he a piano playing hobo? Who plays piano for the piano man?? I'm sorry, I'm having an existential crisis about a very minor character but this confuses me to no end. Is he stuck in some sort of purgatory where he must play the piano on-demand until he earns his way into heaven? Sorry, right back to the episode. Shelby and Rachel sing a duet of Pokerface which is the most bizarre and uncomfortable mother/daughter song choice but honestly, they both sound really good on it.
Will enters the choir room to find all the kids dressed up in their outfits again. They want to know what his big lesson was but Will has no clue. Tina enters wearing her goth clothes again and claims that she learned that she will not dress like somebody she's not to be somebody she's not and that it's good to be theatrical sometimes.
Hard cut to her dressed as a vampire accosting Figgins and threatening to sick her dad, who is King of Vampires on Figgins unless he lets her dress the way she wants. It's ridiculous, it's madness but you know what? THIS. IS. GLEE!! So, you get what you get. Problem is magically resolved. But oops, Kurt and Finn are missing.
Cut to just outside the choir room, Azimio and Karofsky are threatening Kurt again and it's a very poorly written scene that only further proves my point when Kurt dramatically claims that they can hit him all they want but he loves being different and he will never change. You hear that jocks that used to beat the writer up?? HE WILL NEVER CHANGE AND YOU'RE PROBABLY CHANGING HIS OIL OR SOMETHING!! YOU SHUT UP!!
Just then, Finn shows up and he's dressed in a Lady Gaga outfit of his very own. A red rubber dress thing? Anyway, he stands up for Kurt but the two jocks laugh it off. Then the rest of the glee club come out and back them up so they high tail it out of there while basically saying "Next time, Gadget! Neeext Tiiiiiime!"
Rachel is sick of being called a freak but Mercedes says that they are. Finn says they're all freaks together and Will steps in to say "Oh yeah, I totally meant this as the lesson all along!!" No, he admits he didn't plan this but wishes he had because he deems it a good lesson. He's not going to report the two jocks that were just threatening violence on the kids he oversees though. Let's not get too competent up in here. They go back to practice for Regionals, despite seemingly still not having a setlist to practice because Will is just throwing shit against the wall to see what sticks, and handing out weird weekly lessons despite this being an extracurricular activity. The end.
There are two episodes left to go, Dear Readers and shit is about to go down. Will the writers manage to pull off as good a finale as Sectionals was? Will they be able to remember who is dating who? Wait and find out!
We're back to looking at Glee and I'm going to be perfectly honest with you guys, I'm not excited for this. I get that Lady Gaga is huge and people love her. People also love KISS but I'm a fan of neither and that's why I hate theme episodes so very much. There is exactly one theme episode I love and it's because Fleetwood Mac is amazing but if an artist isn't your bag and that's the artist being featured? It makes episodes very painful to sit through. Also, there is a severe lack of Groff and that makes me sad.
The episode starts with a nervous Tina in Figgins' office. She's worried she's in trouble but Will, who is in there with her for reasons, assures her that she's probably there to be commended for her excellent attendance record. Figgins quickly interjects that she is, in fact, in trouble because of her goth wear. Oh yeah, Tina's a goth. That was her character thing, wasn't it? Scary Goth? Now Shy Goth? He calls her Ms. Cohen-Chang and I'm not sure that her last name was ever mentioned before but like, did they not realize that they have only two Asian characters on this show and they gave them both the stereotypical last name Chang. Why is that the go-to for white writers? I'm looking at you too, JK Rowling (Cho Chang). There are so many Asian names out there, do some research instead of just lazily naming them all the same damn thing. Especially in the same damn show where the two characters aren't at all related. This is where I get uncomfortable with the "racist jokes" this show does because they're clearly just that little bit racist themselves. They're not comical bigots like they write in the shows but their that internalized racism variety where they don't see how harmful they're being. I hate it.
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| Thanks, I hate it |
Where was I? Oh yeah, Figgins is chastising Tina for wearing goth outfits. This upsets Figgins because this episode aired around the time that Twilight fever was hitting its peak and he's apparently afraid of vampires. To illustrate this fact we see a group of students (Lauren Zises among them) dressed as vampires attacking Jacob Ben Israel. Did they kill him? Please? Because honestly, if we are rid of him instead of having to deal with the horror that is to come, I will welcome Twihards that randomly attack other students, especially if that student is Jacob Ben Israel. Good riddance.
So, the crisis this episode is that Tina is no longer allowed to dress like a goth or she'll be suspended. Slow down, show. You're going to give me a heart attack with how thrilling and engaging this conflict is.
Carole is leading Finn down some stairs because he's blindfolded. She's trying to surprise him but the surprise is that she's agreed to move in with the Hummel's and now Finn has to share a room with Kurt. That is a pretty crappy surprise for Finn and I'm honestly shocked they're all surprised with how badly he's taking this. Not cool. Kurt even has a shit-eating grin on his face about the whole thing so I guess we're back to him being conniving about getting his crush to move in with him and he's no longer upset about Burt and Finn hanging out? Is that what we're going with? More things to hate this episode. I'm honestly shocked that a gay man is in charge of this show because he is perpetuating a very damaging trope about predatory gay men and that is super not cool. Anyway, Burt gives Finn $300 to redecorate the room and to kind of bribe him into being ok with the sudden move but Kurt immediately yoinks the money from his hand and says he'll take care of redecorating so that he'll make the room a reflection of who he is and who he wants Finn to be.
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| Basically, I'm Homer in The Shinning when watching any episode of Glee |
At glee club, Tina has shown up in sweats and is decidedly unhappy about it. The other kids suggest some different looks she can try but she hates all of them because she is a goth girl, dammit and if she can't shop at Hot Topic, she'll die. Or something like that. Rachel bursts in because she's done some serious research into Vocal Adrenaline (how does Jesse feel about this? Didn't they just get back together? Where is he?) And she's found out they're doing a Lady Gaga number. The kids are all super bummed and ready to give up. Will has no idea who Lady Gaga is and Puck thinks she's a man. That was a big thing in the day, people saying she was a man and it's just rude. I may not be a big fan of her music but come on, don't make it about gender. Anyway, Will gets an incredibly unoriginal idea! They're going to help Tina find a new look and explore theatricality by...copying Vocal Adrenaline and doing Gaga. This is really close to that thing that you got mad at other glee instructors for doing when you were competing at Sectionals, Will. I mean, you're not flat out stealing set-lists but you are stealing act ideas from another group and you only knew they were doing it because one of your kids spied on them. Just because it wasn't directly you doing the spying, doesn't absolve you of guilt, Will Schuester. The girls are ecstatic about this but the boys are decidedly less so. I feel them.
At the Vocal Adrenaline auditorium, Rachel, Quinn, and Mercedes are sneaking in at the back to watch their rivals perform. Rachel claims that stealing their ideas is not a crime but like, the exact same thing happened to you at Sectionals and it definitely hurt, didn't it? All your work went out the window? Don't do to them what was done to you, this is so not cool. They watch Shelby coach the kids and explain to them what theatricality is. To showcase this, she performs Funny Girl by Barbara Streisand. Rachel is like that's totally what I would've done but when she hears Shelby's voice, she freezes. Here's a little thing that I like, they set up in Laryngitis that Rachel has a great ear for detecting voices and so it's believable that she'd immediately recognize Shelby's singing as the one from the tape she just listened to. That's a neat little detail and I like it. I have terrible recognition both visually and audibly. I can't pick a face out from a crowd to save my life and I sure as hell can't pick out voices unless they're very distinct. Kudos to her, I bow to everyone's superiority in this regard because I just can't and never will be able to.
Rachel confronts Shelby and tells her she's her daughter. They sit together in the bleachers to talk and it's very awkward. She asks how Rachel feels and Rachel tells a cute story about how her fathers would bring her water when she was sad and it got to the point that she didn't know if she was sad or just thirsty. Shelby immediately says she shouldn't have done this and backs out as quickly as she can. That was a whole lot of work for abso-fucking-lutely nothing. She tells Rachel she'll call but like, we know she's not going to call. Even Rachel does.
Finn enters Will's office and he's gushing about how amazing Lady Gaga is because well, she allowed Glee to use her musical library so they must stroke her ego, so to speak. Finn isn't interested because he's here to tell Will that, apart from Kurt, none of the guys are thrilled about doing Gaga. Will is like, oh gee, did I do that thing where I refuse to listen to you guys again? And Finn concurs but says he has an idea of what the guys could do for their theatricality assignment.
Quinn and Puck are having an argument about this baby again because he wants to name it Jack Daniels but she doesn't want to name it because she's not keeping it. Also, it's going to be a girl. Also, I guess Puck and Quinn are a thing again. Forget about Santana! Or Mercedes! Just forget everything and treat this episode as a stand alone because Glee sucks at continuity.
Tina is gushing to Kurt about how much she loves her "champagne bubbles" dress because it expresses a whole different side of her when Karofsky (the resident bully) and Azimio bash into her. Kurt stands up for her like a champ and then the bullies act like stereotypical tv bullies which is to say, they're not intimidating at all. They talk about how they're not "gaga for Gaga" which is so lame I cannot even.
Will congratulates the girls, and Kurt, for their fabulous Lady Gaga costumes which far surpass that of which most high schoolers are capable of both in terms of money and talent but whatever. Congrats to the costume designers because the costumes are fun. Rachel is missing and Quinn and Mercedes try to explain what happened. For some reason, Will now tries to act indignant that they're spying on their rivals but is also eager to find out what they found out. They explain to everyone that Shelby is Rachel's mom. Puck thinks that Rachel is going to jump ship to Vocal Adrenaline but Rachel comes in at that moment to say that she'd never do that. (Where is Jesse? Why is no one bringing him up? Did the writers forget he was supposed to be here? Hello? Continuity??? I'm scared.) At least Rachel's dress is cute and definitely suits her.
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| I mean, it's cute for a high school attempt |
The dress is falling apart though because her dads don't know how to sew and stapled the frogs on. I would think they'd stay pretty well. Will doesn't want to talk about a student's obvious emotional turmoil though (unless they're Finn) and instructs the kids to sing. They're cured! They sing Bad Romance by Lady Gaga. It's alright.
Finn is in the boy's bathroom after the performance and he's putting on makeup. Cue Karofsky and Azimio springing out to talk about how much they just hate different things in very obvious language that tells me that whoever wrote this episode was definitely bullied by jocks. And they definitely thought in their heads that they were only picked on because of how special and different they were. I don't mean to armchair psycho-analyze but the message is just so clear here. They threaten to beat Finn up for being a jock and being into glee and equate it to being bisexual which is odd and not relevant but see above.
Rachel goes to see Shelby who tells her to stop sneaking into her rehearsals which is super legit. Rachel isn't there to spy though. She shows off her supposedly tragic (but I think is cute and actually looks like something a high schooler would be able to realistically, put together for school) outfit and says she really needs a mom right now. This show, for how diverse and open it claims to be, has some serious issues with classic gender roles. Why is that a mother's job, Glee? Hmmmmm???
Back at Glee Club, Rachel returns with a brand-new, less cute but more fashionable, outfit that her mother made her. She's very proud of this and the other kids approve. Now it's time for the guys to perform their theatrical song and of course, it's a KISS song, Shout it Out. Will is happy but is curious what their outfits say about them? It's other people's outfits, Will. They proceed to explain KISS lore where Mike doesn't get to talk and Matt has been relegated to "guy who replaces Artie's character when he quits" ouch. No love for Matt or Mike.
Kurt and Tina are talking after the performance when Karofsky and Azimio pop up. Look, I'm not Lady Gaga either but did she spit in these guys' faces or something? They seem to loathe her so much that they can't stand seeing anyone dressed as her, or it sends them into a violent rage. It's weird. I think they beat them up which, wow guys, talk about punching down. Do you feel like big men for punching a small guy and a girl?? Comically evil bad guys.
Kurt and Finn are in their room and he asks Finn to talk to Karofsky and Azimio. Finn lashes out because he's terrified of those two too which is kind of funny. Finn is this big jock and yet Kurt is the one who stood up easily to two bigger jocks. Finn is kind of a coward with no convictions. I get that he's just a boy though and it can be hard to stand up to guys like Karofsky and Azimio but it's just interesting to me that Kurt seems to be a lot braver, especially considering how future storylines go. Anyway, Finn is struggling to take his makeup off and Kurt tries to help him with a moist toilette. Finn is uncomfortable and pushes him away, opting to finish in the laundry room.
Will confronts Shelby about Rachel because he has decided that she's not as into the reunion as Rachel is. To be fair, Shelby says he's right but it's just funny that from Rachel saying she reconnected with Shelby he got that she wasn't into it. Shelby tells a sob story about how she can't have kids anymore and how she wanted a baby back but now can't have one and Rachel is an adult who doesn't need her. With how quickly this is being resolved so she doesn't have to show up again, it tells me that this was not at all the plan they had intended for this story and only threw it in there to appease the fan theory and demand for them to be mother and daughter. I can't prove this is the case but I can definitely speculate that this is what happened because this is just sloppy and just wait until you get to the finale.
Kurt is showing off their newly redesigned room to Finn and there are a lot of frills and shawls everywhere so Finn, of course, hates it. Kurt is offended because he worked really hard on it and like, you could have tried, I don't know-shot in the dark here but, maybe ASKING FINN FOR HIS OPINION BEFORE REDOING EVERYTHING?? They really wanted to make Kurt the victim here but honestly, I'm mostly on Finn's side and I hate Finn. Imagine having to move houses really suddenly, without being asked. Then you find out you have to share a room with someone who you have no interest in but clearly has an interest in you. Then they redecorate the space completely to their tastes, making you feel completely lost and probably unwelcome. Wouldn't you explode too? I really can't blame him.
Part of Finn's problem is the fact that Kurt is a guy who happens to be gay and the show really wants that to be the problem but I imagine it would be very uncomfortable to suddenly have to room with and get dressed in front of a stranger regardless of sexual orientation. That's a lot and it's very valid for him to want some privacy. However, then Finn starts throwing the word "f*ggy" around and that is not cool. Burt here's and stomps down like a champion to tell Finn off for that language. Kurt tries to brush it off but Burt won't hear it. He throws Finn out of the house because he won't tolerate that language under his roof, even if it costs him his relationship, his child comes first. Kurt, you best sit down and shut up from now on. I don't want to hear anything about how your dad isn't there for you anymore. This man is a saint and you will recognize his love for you or I will make you. #TeamBurt.
In Glee Club, Finn tries to apologize to Kurt but he won't hear it because now he gets to play victim despite being responsible for all of it, conniving to get his parents together, pushing them to move in so you could spend time with Finn, redecorating the room in the way you wanted without consulting Finn at all. I'm not saying what Finn said was right, I'm saying that Kurt needs to accept some responsibility for the mess he caused.
Puck saunters in because he has something to say to Quinn and he wants everyone to hear it. He apologizes for suggesting such a stupid name for the baby and tells her he understands that he's giving her up but that before she does, he thinks she should name her baby Beth, then he asks the guys help to sing a song for her. Hilariously, Finn also joins in which is weird considering the past drama there. They sing Beth by KISS. I am distracted through the whole performance by Quinn's ginormous eyelashes batting constantly and having a tear stuck in them.
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| It's mesmerizing |
Rachel and Shelby meet in the auditorium to talk. Shelby confesses what she said to Will and Rachel admits that she feels the same way (convenient) that there is no bond there. Instead of ignoring each other, they will just admire from afar for now. Shelby then gifts Rachel with a cup for her water that has gold stars on it. That's kind of sweet and of course gold stars are her thing, they're Rachel's thing too. Rachel asks if she'll sing a duet with her before they part ways and Shelby readily agrees. Rachel commands Brad the piano guy to come out and mentions that he's just always here and...wait.
Who is Brad? Where does he come from? Why is he always just around? Does he sleep in the auditorium, waiting for the kids to ask him to hit it? Is he a piano playing hobo? Who plays piano for the piano man?? I'm sorry, I'm having an existential crisis about a very minor character but this confuses me to no end. Is he stuck in some sort of purgatory where he must play the piano on-demand until he earns his way into heaven? Sorry, right back to the episode. Shelby and Rachel sing a duet of Pokerface which is the most bizarre and uncomfortable mother/daughter song choice but honestly, they both sound really good on it.
Will enters the choir room to find all the kids dressed up in their outfits again. They want to know what his big lesson was but Will has no clue. Tina enters wearing her goth clothes again and claims that she learned that she will not dress like somebody she's not to be somebody she's not and that it's good to be theatrical sometimes.
Hard cut to her dressed as a vampire accosting Figgins and threatening to sick her dad, who is King of Vampires on Figgins unless he lets her dress the way she wants. It's ridiculous, it's madness but you know what? THIS. IS. GLEE!! So, you get what you get. Problem is magically resolved. But oops, Kurt and Finn are missing.
Cut to just outside the choir room, Azimio and Karofsky are threatening Kurt again and it's a very poorly written scene that only further proves my point when Kurt dramatically claims that they can hit him all they want but he loves being different and he will never change. You hear that jocks that used to beat the writer up?? HE WILL NEVER CHANGE AND YOU'RE PROBABLY CHANGING HIS OIL OR SOMETHING!! YOU SHUT UP!!
Just then, Finn shows up and he's dressed in a Lady Gaga outfit of his very own. A red rubber dress thing? Anyway, he stands up for Kurt but the two jocks laugh it off. Then the rest of the glee club come out and back them up so they high tail it out of there while basically saying "Next time, Gadget! Neeext Tiiiiiime!"
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| You're damn straight I gave them evil mustaches! |
Rachel is sick of being called a freak but Mercedes says that they are. Finn says they're all freaks together and Will steps in to say "Oh yeah, I totally meant this as the lesson all along!!" No, he admits he didn't plan this but wishes he had because he deems it a good lesson. He's not going to report the two jocks that were just threatening violence on the kids he oversees though. Let's not get too competent up in here. They go back to practice for Regionals, despite seemingly still not having a setlist to practice because Will is just throwing shit against the wall to see what sticks, and handing out weird weekly lessons despite this being an extracurricular activity. The end.
There are two episodes left to go, Dear Readers and shit is about to go down. Will the writers manage to pull off as good a finale as Sectionals was? Will they be able to remember who is dating who? Wait and find out!
Can I just say I adore your running bit of slapping evil mustaches and monacles on the villains?
ReplyDelete*bows* I'm glad my silly bit amuses someone other than me. I adore it too because they always make me giggle like a child when I make them. :P
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