Original airdate: April 20, 2010
After a fairly nice intro back, we jump right into one of the biggest issues I have with Glee, the theme episode but doubled with an overload of songs. On top of that, our intro back already made us hate the two male leads but they're not done yet. The writers intend for us to hate most everyone on this show and continuity is going to go right out the window. I like to call the back 9 episodes the era of too much and too little. Too much music and bombastic characters for cheap laughs with no regard to consequences and too little development. Let's get right to it.
The episode starts with Sue furiously scrawling in her diary and narrating to us about how much she loves Madonna. So, we're already off to a pretty shaky start. This does not fit with Sue at all but I think they wanted to get Jane Lynch to sing so they really had no choice but to make this theme her choice, I guess. After telling us about how awesome Madonna is, she charges into Figgins' office and demands that he play her greatest hits CD over the intercom all day. If you'll remember, she roofied and either slept with or made him think she slept with him and then blackmailed him for her job back so obviously, she's still using the leverage against him.
So, basically, Sue is obsessed with Madonna for reasons. No, it's because she's powerful and I just can't get into this because it really just feels like the episode is bending over backwards to appease Madonna's ego so she'll give them the rights to use her songs and it doesn't make for a compelling episode and comes off more like a themed karaoke night. Ugh. I'm sorry if you're a fan of these episodes but I just am not.
Anyway, at cheer practice, Sue is indoctrinating the Cheerios into her insane cult of loving Madonna to the point that she no longer wants to recognize that any of them have last names.
At glee club, Rachel asks the girls about dating while trying to still deny that she is dating Jessie. She starts off by saying they went to a Wiggles concert which...sounds like the worst date idea ever and then she goes into how they started making out and how erotic it was and...you were just at a concert hall filled with toddlers, that is the exact opposite of erotic this is grossing me out way too much. Moving on, we learn that Jessie wants to do it which, if he's just doing this to destroy the glee club, that's hella messed up. He got crabby and left her without taking home the Care Bear she won for him playing skee ball. Rachel wants to be ready for the inevitability of sex but wants to know how to tell a guy no without him getting mad at her.
Side note, if this sounds super familiar it's because we just did a recap of Dawson's Creek where Joey is basically going through this exact same issue and honestly, I have a bit of a bone to pick with this. In the first half of this season, Rachel was portrayed as the opposite of Quinn who was captain of the celibacy club. She was super into the idea of sex and this feels like a betrayal to me. You could say that she's nervous about doing it with Jessie because she still has feelings for Finn but I just don't buy this nervousness when she seems really into Jessie. But really my gripe is that any time sex is brought up on a teen show between a main female character and any guy, she almost 100% has to be freaked out about it. Maybe this is a common experience for some people but I hate this portrayal because it pushes this "good girl" narrative that I'm not here for. Personally, if I'm super into a guy, I'm going to want to go there in some capacity, not back out after a few kisses and presenting girls being nervous about sex in fairly stable relationships just sends all kinds of weird messages to girls that I don't like. The biggest bad one being this underlying good girls are nervous about sex/bad girls jump right into it and get punished for it narrative. I hate it. End rant.
Santana's advice is to never say no and Brittany adds "what's the worst that can happen?" then immediately apologizes to Quinn because oh right. Mercedes last crush was on Kurt so she feels underqualified to give advice on dating.
Tina then adds that they have to face the fact that the guys are just going to be jerks to them and then the show decides to ruin yet another ship that people enjoyed in Tina and Artie. Oh, did you think they were back together? Well, we learn that he decided to forgive her for her stutter but then issues a bunch of changes he wants her to make in order to date him. So, fuck Artie right along with Will and Finn, I guess. Why does this show want all of their guys to suck so bad? Even Jessie this episode sucks for getting crabby and leaving without Rachel's Care Bear.
Will actually agrees with me that at least the other guys are trash and chats with the girls about their issues with them. He suggests talking to Mrs. Pilsbury when they say they're not comfortable talking with him. They say it's because he's a guy but we all know it's because they realize he's just as bad as the boys they're complaining about. Emma is useless though because she's a virgin which in and of itself doesn't disqualify you from being informed and comfortable talking about sex but Emma is a basket of nerves about the subject and fails at giving good advice at the best of times.
Will talks with Emma about her inability to give advice to the kids on sex and she laments being a failure in this regard and that she really wants to help the kids. Will offers to help her but like, not making her have sex with him or anything and Emma gets all flustered because I guess she was hoping that's what he was offering? But...just last episode she dumped him because of the whole "Hello Again" debacle. This was last episode...why are the writers so bad at consistency? Then they shame some female celebrities, namely Britney Spears, Lindsay Lohan, and Ann Coulter, for being poor role models which is pretty gross. I mean, sure, I'll give them Ann Coulter but Lindsay? She was going through some issues that shouldn't have been so publicized and Britney? She was having a severe and very serious mental health break down so how dare anyone make fun of her for that.
Anyway, Will wants to work together to help each other get more confident about helping others. Then Will walks down the hall and comes across Sue's Cheerios practicing a routine to Ray of Light by Madonna and it's an interesting routine to the song but it lasts a long while and does nothing to really move the plot forward. Ok, it sort of does because it inspires Will to also do Madonna with his glee club so he just kind of copies Sue's idea. Sue is unhappy with her Cheerios and calls them "Sloppy Freakshow Babies". Will tells her he's impressed with what she's done and Sue mocks him.
Will tells the glee kids that they are going to be doing Madonna songs and most of them seem excited about this but all of the guys, excluding Kurt, are not impressed with this. They don't want to do a project they view as "girly" so Will calls them out for their shitty behaviour towards the girls in the group. Will calls them misogynistic but Finn has no clue what that means so Brittany helps him out.
Will tells them to put themselves in the girls' shoes and that Madonna's message is about equality apparently. I'm not saying that she doesn't believe in that but her music is mostly about sex and being sexy, feel free to correct me if I'm wrong but I don't really care that much about Madonna's music so either way, I'm good. Kurt pulls a Dawson and wants to tackle this assignment in a more visual medium AKA a movie...well a music video at least. This will come up later. Puck doesn't think she translates to show choir so Rachel proves him wrong by getting the girls perform Express Yourself with her. It's decent. You can tell I'm just not feeling this episode, right? I'm sorry but it's just so tedious. These songs offer nothing to the narrative and are just here to be Madonna songs and pad out the episode.
We come back to Brittany and Santana talking about dating and Brittany is apparently dating someone who's 7 which is really gross. What's with all these casual references to inappropriate age relationships? I don't dig these types of jokes, in case you couldn't tell from earlier blog posts about this very subject. It's not better when it's a teen going after a child, guys. Anyway, Santana wants to find herself a younger man too because they are trying to be more Madonna-like. Brittany suggests Finn which they've already fucked up and thank continuity they do address this fact but Brittany thinks that if Santana offers to take his v-card, he will forget about the whole hating them thing. I hate that she's most definitely right about a large majority of guys.
Santana goes right to Finn and propositions him for another date, clarifying that it's just with her this time. He asks if she'll talk to him this time but she doesn't like to talk during. Finn is too dumb to get innuendos so Santana spells it out for him, she tells him that she wants to take his virginity. He rejects her because he likes someone else and wants to work it out with her (Rachel) and Santana tells him that she's totally still dating Jessie. Finn doesn't understand what he'll get out of it and Santana is like uh, sex and then tells him to think about it.
Sue bursts into Emma's office to basically shame her for her lack of confidence and sex appeal. She also tells her that she doesn't deserve the power of Madonna so she disconnected the intercom in her office so she can't listen to the songs. Honestly? I'd take that as a blessing.
Rachel finds Finn in the choir room and asks him to work on a duet to get everyone on board with the whole Madonna thing. He asks her flat out if she's still with Jessie and she tries to lie at first but then admits she is. He's pissed but Rachel begs him not to tell anyone and asks if they can be friends. He agrees but begrudgingly. Then they perform Open Your Heart which is, I think supposed to show how much they still like each other. I still don't like Finn so this does nothing for me. Also still not the biggest Madonna fan so this really does nothing for me.
Mercedes and Kurt are chatting about their project idea when Will comes up to ask how they're doing. Sue comes up and is pissed that the glee kids are also doing Madonna. She doesn't take kindly to this because Madonna belongs to her and only her. Will stand up for himself and calls her out for her overuse of hair jokes against him so he shoots back about her own hair, asking her how the Florence Henderson look is going for her. Then, he suggests she try a new setting on her flowbee and he's very impressed with himself.
Sue is actually crushed by this but I thought they were pretty mild? She freaks out and storms down the hallway while shoving kids so, there's another few times she should be fired. Meanwhile, Finn goes up to Santana and agrees to her offer. She's super happy with this.
Kurt and Mercedes apparently feel bad for how mean Will was to Sue and go to talk to her. Sue then divulges too much about her personal backstory about how poor they were and couldn't keep up with current styles. When she got hooked on Madonna, she felt inspired and insisted on bleaching her hair to look just like her. They had to use whatever chemicals they had around the house which completely damaged her hair so she's had to wear it short ever since. She admits to mocking Will's hair because she's jealous. Kurt and Mercedes offer to help her find a new look if she'll let them use the Cheerios for their video project.
Rachel is in the library when a book falls in her path. It's Sondheim on Music so she knows it's Jessie. He apologizes to her for being mean to her at her house and asks if she still has his Care Bear. Aw, this is why he's forgiven. Rachel wants to talk to him but Jessie insists on going first because he was out of line the other night and that she deserves better than that. She deserves romance and he's willing to wait. He then asks her what she wanted to tell him and she's like, I'm ready which is really the best answer after lines like that. I mean, I'd be ready were I a teen that actually had a guy talking to me like this. Rachel still looks nervous though.
Emma calls after Will and rushes up to him to babble about how Sue's words completely wrecked her and she doesn't want to feel sexless anymore. I feel bad for her, there is an insane amount of pressure on people to be socially active and even more pressure on women to both be sexually active but like not too sexually active or maybe never until marriage because purity or some junk but don't act like a prude and the messages are confusing and horrible and make you feel so little. Basically, I want to give Emma a hug. Emma wants to take control of herself and her body and asks Will to have sex with her. In spite of the fact that they already agreed not to date because it was way too quick after his separation, they are both into this idea and call it a date.
Next we cut to Artie filming a music video for Vogue, which is essentially exactly like Madonna's video but with Sue singing and in her role and various Glee characters in the background instead of Vogue models. She changes a few words to be about her and her hatred of Will but otherwise it's just a funny remake of an existing music video. It's alright. I mean, you get my problem with these episodes, right? If you are not a super fan, all these songs are going to feel tedious, there is no variety. And they have the audacity to not play the one song of Madonna's I mildly enjoy so basically this has nothing for me.
We cut straight from that musical number to Rachel getting ready to lose her V card along with Finn and Emma and then they launch right into Like a Virgin. Ok, I like this song so I guess it has this one going for it. It's a cute song but again, it's the whole song right after another whole song and it drags everything to a halt because the entire thing is a fantasy sequence. By the time they're done singing, they're all right back to the beginning where they are nervously getting ready to do the deed.
Kurt and Mercedes are excited about how well their project went and wonder what look Sue settled on from their video. Shocker though, Sue shows up looking like she always does because she decided that she's fine just the way she is. We flashback to a meeting she had with Figgins where she's sporting a Madonna cone bra. Figgins finds this distracting so he tells her that she's an original like Madonna and doesn't need to copy anyone. Sue doesn't want to reinvent herself but everyone else, starting with them.
Finn asks how Rachel's date with Jessie went. Rachel says that she totally went through with it and how great it was but we flashback to her telling Jessie that she's not ready. For his part, this time he's supportive when she tells him that she feels like she'd be betraying the team. Rachel then asks Finn how his date went. Finn says that he couldn't go through with it but we flashback to him and Santana in a cheap motel room and they totally did it. Santana gives no craps but Finn is disappointed that it didn't feel like anything because it didn't mean anything. I don't like that Finn is lying about being a virgin, that is a really shady thing to do and it takes forever for this lie to resurface again but it does.
We next go to Emma approaching Will who was apparently worried because he couldn't get hold of her all weekend. Emma was embarrassed because she really wanted to have sex with him and felt bad that she couldn't go through with it and then fled his apartment without her shoes on. She's disappointed because she wanted to take ownership of her body and Will points out that she did by telling herself she wasn't ready and stopping things. He then apologizes for even going through with it to begin with because he's trying to teach the boys to treat the girls better and should take his own advice. Thank you, Will. I was gonna say. Emma and Will agree but this time for reals not to date until his divorce is final. He filed that day and he wants her to get help with her problems and get counseling so they'll both be in better places when they do date.
Jessie pops into Will's office just then and wants to talk. We cut to Finn being super pissed because apparently Jessie is switching schools and joining New Directions. The other kids aren't very pleased either because he's obviously a spy and he'll take most of the other leads. Brittany asks the real question though and it's if Jessie is Will's son.
Rachel asks why he's doing this and Jessie confesses that he's doing it for love because he cares about her and knows she'd never be able to give herself to him fully if he was working for the enemy so he switched over. This is the point where I start to get confused because this is a move that would fuck over Vocal Adrenaline because of how hard it would be to transfer schools. I was convinced that he was absolutely telling the truth and that the whole thing with Shelby was that she was pushing him to do this thing he didn't want to do and ended up falling for Rachel and so here we are. Rachel is super happy to hear this because it's all the drama and romance that her little heart could desire.
We cut immediately to another Cheerios performance to 4 Minutes (Madonna ft Justin Timberlake) but this time, the singing is live and by Kurt and Mercedes who are also wearing Cheerios outfits. Oh no!! I admit that this performance is impressive and if they do a cheer routine like this at competition, I could see them winning. Will looks pissed though. Which I really don't get. He asks Sue what the hell is up and she's like Kurt and Mercedes just tore that Madonna song a new one and I couldn't agree more. Will is still really dumb and is like "wait, you two are Cheerios now?" and like, I thought that's what he was pissed about in the first place?? Anyway, they are like yes we are and we're doing both so what's the big deal? Sue once again makes fun of Will's hair, end scene.
We cut to the guys singing yet another Madonna song, What It Feels Like For a Girl. I really don't like this song and it's one of those songs that sounds kind of creepy as sung by guys. They sound fine but just the tone doesn't work for me. Ever hear the guy version of Cyndi Lauper's Girls Just Want to Have Fun? Yeah, same effect. I know it was originally written by a guy but it just comes off really creepy sung by a guy.
Puck isn't down with it either and complains that he enjoys being a guy and Finn points out that it's because it's easy being a guy. Puck then engages in some classic toxic masculinity in that he mocks Finn for daring to sympatize with women by claiming he's a literal girl (insinuating that it's weak to be one and thus exactly proving the point Will was trying to make). Artie admits that he was being a dink to Tina and we cut to her telling him off which is super satisfying. Finn finally realizes how shit he was being too so I guess the guys are redeemed like a sliver of an amount. Even Will admits he needed to learn this lesson too. They don't have to perform this song they don't like but they do have to start treating all of the girls with more respect.
We cut to Artie apologizing for being a massive dink to Tina by dictating what she should wear to please him and tells her that he's fine with whatever makes her feel comfortable. She accepts his apology and it's kind of sweet. Ok, Artie, I guess I can forgive you too but I know I'll probably hate you again soon because this is Glee, bitch. No one gets out without being just the worst on this show.
Finn approaches Rachel to apologize for being such an ass and admits that he really liked her but his actions pushed her away. Jessie approaches and challenges Finn to a sing off in the parking lot because he figures the rivalry is coming anyway but Finn welcomes him to the group, laughably saying that he doesn't want to carry the group by himself and is happy for the break. Oh, honey.
They shake on it, much to Rachel's disappointment, I think. Hey, girl loves drama and nothing is more dramatic than two guys fighting/singing over you. Instead, the guys walk off to practice together.
We cut to yet another song. Like a Prayer. It's a fine performance but I'm super burned out on the songs but that means that my recapping is done because after this is the end of the episode. They will never explain how the glee club affords an entire choir to perform for a practice with them but this show does not pretend to ever be realistic so just go with it.
Remember last season how there were maybe 3-4 songs an episode? This episode alone has 8. 8 flipping songs. Even if I'm fair and don't count the first Cheerios performance because that was just the original song playing while the Cheerios did their routine, that's still 7 songs in a 45 minute episode. It's a lot and for my tastes, a bit much. It wouldn't be so bad if the songs informed us about character or advanced the plot a bit but most of them are just little dance numbers or an exact music video recreation. It's tedious on rewatch but again, I'm not a Madonna fan so I guess if you are, this episode is probably amazing. I do question though, do you just want to watch fun performances or do you actually like the show? I started to feel like I was a minority for actually liking the dark humour and silly characters from last season. I wanted that developed but the writers seem incapable of making anything but over the top stereotype characters for cheap laughs. So, instead of putting the work in, they were hoping that stuffing the episodes with fun musical numbers would appease people. For the most part, I think it worked because the show was still a hit and people LOVED the extra songs. So what will we get in the next episode, Home? Will we hate more characters? Will we get more songs? Less songs? I guess we'll soon find out.
After a fairly nice intro back, we jump right into one of the biggest issues I have with Glee, the theme episode but doubled with an overload of songs. On top of that, our intro back already made us hate the two male leads but they're not done yet. The writers intend for us to hate most everyone on this show and continuity is going to go right out the window. I like to call the back 9 episodes the era of too much and too little. Too much music and bombastic characters for cheap laughs with no regard to consequences and too little development. Let's get right to it.
The episode starts with Sue furiously scrawling in her diary and narrating to us about how much she loves Madonna. So, we're already off to a pretty shaky start. This does not fit with Sue at all but I think they wanted to get Jane Lynch to sing so they really had no choice but to make this theme her choice, I guess. After telling us about how awesome Madonna is, she charges into Figgins' office and demands that he play her greatest hits CD over the intercom all day. If you'll remember, she roofied and either slept with or made him think she slept with him and then blackmailed him for her job back so obviously, she's still using the leverage against him.
So, basically, Sue is obsessed with Madonna for reasons. No, it's because she's powerful and I just can't get into this because it really just feels like the episode is bending over backwards to appease Madonna's ego so she'll give them the rights to use her songs and it doesn't make for a compelling episode and comes off more like a themed karaoke night. Ugh. I'm sorry if you're a fan of these episodes but I just am not.
Anyway, at cheer practice, Sue is indoctrinating the Cheerios into her insane cult of loving Madonna to the point that she no longer wants to recognize that any of them have last names.
At glee club, Rachel asks the girls about dating while trying to still deny that she is dating Jessie. She starts off by saying they went to a Wiggles concert which...sounds like the worst date idea ever and then she goes into how they started making out and how erotic it was and...you were just at a concert hall filled with toddlers, that is the exact opposite of erotic this is grossing me out way too much. Moving on, we learn that Jessie wants to do it which, if he's just doing this to destroy the glee club, that's hella messed up. He got crabby and left her without taking home the Care Bear she won for him playing skee ball. Rachel wants to be ready for the inevitability of sex but wants to know how to tell a guy no without him getting mad at her.
Side note, if this sounds super familiar it's because we just did a recap of Dawson's Creek where Joey is basically going through this exact same issue and honestly, I have a bit of a bone to pick with this. In the first half of this season, Rachel was portrayed as the opposite of Quinn who was captain of the celibacy club. She was super into the idea of sex and this feels like a betrayal to me. You could say that she's nervous about doing it with Jessie because she still has feelings for Finn but I just don't buy this nervousness when she seems really into Jessie. But really my gripe is that any time sex is brought up on a teen show between a main female character and any guy, she almost 100% has to be freaked out about it. Maybe this is a common experience for some people but I hate this portrayal because it pushes this "good girl" narrative that I'm not here for. Personally, if I'm super into a guy, I'm going to want to go there in some capacity, not back out after a few kisses and presenting girls being nervous about sex in fairly stable relationships just sends all kinds of weird messages to girls that I don't like. The biggest bad one being this underlying good girls are nervous about sex/bad girls jump right into it and get punished for it narrative. I hate it. End rant.
Santana's advice is to never say no and Brittany adds "what's the worst that can happen?" then immediately apologizes to Quinn because oh right. Mercedes last crush was on Kurt so she feels underqualified to give advice on dating.
Tina then adds that they have to face the fact that the guys are just going to be jerks to them and then the show decides to ruin yet another ship that people enjoyed in Tina and Artie. Oh, did you think they were back together? Well, we learn that he decided to forgive her for her stutter but then issues a bunch of changes he wants her to make in order to date him. So, fuck Artie right along with Will and Finn, I guess. Why does this show want all of their guys to suck so bad? Even Jessie this episode sucks for getting crabby and leaving without Rachel's Care Bear.
Will actually agrees with me that at least the other guys are trash and chats with the girls about their issues with them. He suggests talking to Mrs. Pilsbury when they say they're not comfortable talking with him. They say it's because he's a guy but we all know it's because they realize he's just as bad as the boys they're complaining about. Emma is useless though because she's a virgin which in and of itself doesn't disqualify you from being informed and comfortable talking about sex but Emma is a basket of nerves about the subject and fails at giving good advice at the best of times.
Will talks with Emma about her inability to give advice to the kids on sex and she laments being a failure in this regard and that she really wants to help the kids. Will offers to help her but like, not making her have sex with him or anything and Emma gets all flustered because I guess she was hoping that's what he was offering? But...just last episode she dumped him because of the whole "Hello Again" debacle. This was last episode...why are the writers so bad at consistency? Then they shame some female celebrities, namely Britney Spears, Lindsay Lohan, and Ann Coulter, for being poor role models which is pretty gross. I mean, sure, I'll give them Ann Coulter but Lindsay? She was going through some issues that shouldn't have been so publicized and Britney? She was having a severe and very serious mental health break down so how dare anyone make fun of her for that.
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| You don't deserve her |
Anyway, Will wants to work together to help each other get more confident about helping others. Then Will walks down the hall and comes across Sue's Cheerios practicing a routine to Ray of Light by Madonna and it's an interesting routine to the song but it lasts a long while and does nothing to really move the plot forward. Ok, it sort of does because it inspires Will to also do Madonna with his glee club so he just kind of copies Sue's idea. Sue is unhappy with her Cheerios and calls them "Sloppy Freakshow Babies". Will tells her he's impressed with what she's done and Sue mocks him.
Will tells the glee kids that they are going to be doing Madonna songs and most of them seem excited about this but all of the guys, excluding Kurt, are not impressed with this. They don't want to do a project they view as "girly" so Will calls them out for their shitty behaviour towards the girls in the group. Will calls them misogynistic but Finn has no clue what that means so Brittany helps him out.
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| Thanks, Sweetie |
Will tells them to put themselves in the girls' shoes and that Madonna's message is about equality apparently. I'm not saying that she doesn't believe in that but her music is mostly about sex and being sexy, feel free to correct me if I'm wrong but I don't really care that much about Madonna's music so either way, I'm good. Kurt pulls a Dawson and wants to tackle this assignment in a more visual medium AKA a movie...well a music video at least. This will come up later. Puck doesn't think she translates to show choir so Rachel proves him wrong by getting the girls perform Express Yourself with her. It's decent. You can tell I'm just not feeling this episode, right? I'm sorry but it's just so tedious. These songs offer nothing to the narrative and are just here to be Madonna songs and pad out the episode.
We come back to Brittany and Santana talking about dating and Brittany is apparently dating someone who's 7 which is really gross. What's with all these casual references to inappropriate age relationships? I don't dig these types of jokes, in case you couldn't tell from earlier blog posts about this very subject. It's not better when it's a teen going after a child, guys. Anyway, Santana wants to find herself a younger man too because they are trying to be more Madonna-like. Brittany suggests Finn which they've already fucked up and thank continuity they do address this fact but Brittany thinks that if Santana offers to take his v-card, he will forget about the whole hating them thing. I hate that she's most definitely right about a large majority of guys.
Santana goes right to Finn and propositions him for another date, clarifying that it's just with her this time. He asks if she'll talk to him this time but she doesn't like to talk during. Finn is too dumb to get innuendos so Santana spells it out for him, she tells him that she wants to take his virginity. He rejects her because he likes someone else and wants to work it out with her (Rachel) and Santana tells him that she's totally still dating Jessie. Finn doesn't understand what he'll get out of it and Santana is like uh, sex and then tells him to think about it.
Sue bursts into Emma's office to basically shame her for her lack of confidence and sex appeal. She also tells her that she doesn't deserve the power of Madonna so she disconnected the intercom in her office so she can't listen to the songs. Honestly? I'd take that as a blessing.
Rachel finds Finn in the choir room and asks him to work on a duet to get everyone on board with the whole Madonna thing. He asks her flat out if she's still with Jessie and she tries to lie at first but then admits she is. He's pissed but Rachel begs him not to tell anyone and asks if they can be friends. He agrees but begrudgingly. Then they perform Open Your Heart which is, I think supposed to show how much they still like each other. I still don't like Finn so this does nothing for me. Also still not the biggest Madonna fan so this really does nothing for me.
Mercedes and Kurt are chatting about their project idea when Will comes up to ask how they're doing. Sue comes up and is pissed that the glee kids are also doing Madonna. She doesn't take kindly to this because Madonna belongs to her and only her. Will stand up for himself and calls her out for her overuse of hair jokes against him so he shoots back about her own hair, asking her how the Florence Henderson look is going for her. Then, he suggests she try a new setting on her flowbee and he's very impressed with himself.
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| It wasn't that good a burn, Will |
Sue is actually crushed by this but I thought they were pretty mild? She freaks out and storms down the hallway while shoving kids so, there's another few times she should be fired. Meanwhile, Finn goes up to Santana and agrees to her offer. She's super happy with this.
Kurt and Mercedes apparently feel bad for how mean Will was to Sue and go to talk to her. Sue then divulges too much about her personal backstory about how poor they were and couldn't keep up with current styles. When she got hooked on Madonna, she felt inspired and insisted on bleaching her hair to look just like her. They had to use whatever chemicals they had around the house which completely damaged her hair so she's had to wear it short ever since. She admits to mocking Will's hair because she's jealous. Kurt and Mercedes offer to help her find a new look if she'll let them use the Cheerios for their video project.
Rachel is in the library when a book falls in her path. It's Sondheim on Music so she knows it's Jessie. He apologizes to her for being mean to her at her house and asks if she still has his Care Bear. Aw, this is why he's forgiven. Rachel wants to talk to him but Jessie insists on going first because he was out of line the other night and that she deserves better than that. She deserves romance and he's willing to wait. He then asks her what she wanted to tell him and she's like, I'm ready which is really the best answer after lines like that. I mean, I'd be ready were I a teen that actually had a guy talking to me like this. Rachel still looks nervous though.
Emma calls after Will and rushes up to him to babble about how Sue's words completely wrecked her and she doesn't want to feel sexless anymore. I feel bad for her, there is an insane amount of pressure on people to be socially active and even more pressure on women to both be sexually active but like not too sexually active or maybe never until marriage because purity or some junk but don't act like a prude and the messages are confusing and horrible and make you feel so little. Basically, I want to give Emma a hug. Emma wants to take control of herself and her body and asks Will to have sex with her. In spite of the fact that they already agreed not to date because it was way too quick after his separation, they are both into this idea and call it a date.
Next we cut to Artie filming a music video for Vogue, which is essentially exactly like Madonna's video but with Sue singing and in her role and various Glee characters in the background instead of Vogue models. She changes a few words to be about her and her hatred of Will but otherwise it's just a funny remake of an existing music video. It's alright. I mean, you get my problem with these episodes, right? If you are not a super fan, all these songs are going to feel tedious, there is no variety. And they have the audacity to not play the one song of Madonna's I mildly enjoy so basically this has nothing for me.
We cut straight from that musical number to Rachel getting ready to lose her V card along with Finn and Emma and then they launch right into Like a Virgin. Ok, I like this song so I guess it has this one going for it. It's a cute song but again, it's the whole song right after another whole song and it drags everything to a halt because the entire thing is a fantasy sequence. By the time they're done singing, they're all right back to the beginning where they are nervously getting ready to do the deed.
Kurt and Mercedes are excited about how well their project went and wonder what look Sue settled on from their video. Shocker though, Sue shows up looking like she always does because she decided that she's fine just the way she is. We flashback to a meeting she had with Figgins where she's sporting a Madonna cone bra. Figgins finds this distracting so he tells her that she's an original like Madonna and doesn't need to copy anyone. Sue doesn't want to reinvent herself but everyone else, starting with them.
Finn asks how Rachel's date with Jessie went. Rachel says that she totally went through with it and how great it was but we flashback to her telling Jessie that she's not ready. For his part, this time he's supportive when she tells him that she feels like she'd be betraying the team. Rachel then asks Finn how his date went. Finn says that he couldn't go through with it but we flashback to him and Santana in a cheap motel room and they totally did it. Santana gives no craps but Finn is disappointed that it didn't feel like anything because it didn't mean anything. I don't like that Finn is lying about being a virgin, that is a really shady thing to do and it takes forever for this lie to resurface again but it does.
We next go to Emma approaching Will who was apparently worried because he couldn't get hold of her all weekend. Emma was embarrassed because she really wanted to have sex with him and felt bad that she couldn't go through with it and then fled his apartment without her shoes on. She's disappointed because she wanted to take ownership of her body and Will points out that she did by telling herself she wasn't ready and stopping things. He then apologizes for even going through with it to begin with because he's trying to teach the boys to treat the girls better and should take his own advice. Thank you, Will. I was gonna say. Emma and Will agree but this time for reals not to date until his divorce is final. He filed that day and he wants her to get help with her problems and get counseling so they'll both be in better places when they do date.
Jessie pops into Will's office just then and wants to talk. We cut to Finn being super pissed because apparently Jessie is switching schools and joining New Directions. The other kids aren't very pleased either because he's obviously a spy and he'll take most of the other leads. Brittany asks the real question though and it's if Jessie is Will's son.
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| I mean, it's a really fair question. |
Rachel asks why he's doing this and Jessie confesses that he's doing it for love because he cares about her and knows she'd never be able to give herself to him fully if he was working for the enemy so he switched over. This is the point where I start to get confused because this is a move that would fuck over Vocal Adrenaline because of how hard it would be to transfer schools. I was convinced that he was absolutely telling the truth and that the whole thing with Shelby was that she was pushing him to do this thing he didn't want to do and ended up falling for Rachel and so here we are. Rachel is super happy to hear this because it's all the drama and romance that her little heart could desire.
We cut immediately to another Cheerios performance to 4 Minutes (Madonna ft Justin Timberlake) but this time, the singing is live and by Kurt and Mercedes who are also wearing Cheerios outfits. Oh no!! I admit that this performance is impressive and if they do a cheer routine like this at competition, I could see them winning. Will looks pissed though. Which I really don't get. He asks Sue what the hell is up and she's like Kurt and Mercedes just tore that Madonna song a new one and I couldn't agree more. Will is still really dumb and is like "wait, you two are Cheerios now?" and like, I thought that's what he was pissed about in the first place?? Anyway, they are like yes we are and we're doing both so what's the big deal? Sue once again makes fun of Will's hair, end scene.
We cut to the guys singing yet another Madonna song, What It Feels Like For a Girl. I really don't like this song and it's one of those songs that sounds kind of creepy as sung by guys. They sound fine but just the tone doesn't work for me. Ever hear the guy version of Cyndi Lauper's Girls Just Want to Have Fun? Yeah, same effect. I know it was originally written by a guy but it just comes off really creepy sung by a guy.
Puck isn't down with it either and complains that he enjoys being a guy and Finn points out that it's because it's easy being a guy. Puck then engages in some classic toxic masculinity in that he mocks Finn for daring to sympatize with women by claiming he's a literal girl (insinuating that it's weak to be one and thus exactly proving the point Will was trying to make). Artie admits that he was being a dink to Tina and we cut to her telling him off which is super satisfying. Finn finally realizes how shit he was being too so I guess the guys are redeemed like a sliver of an amount. Even Will admits he needed to learn this lesson too. They don't have to perform this song they don't like but they do have to start treating all of the girls with more respect.
We cut to Artie apologizing for being a massive dink to Tina by dictating what she should wear to please him and tells her that he's fine with whatever makes her feel comfortable. She accepts his apology and it's kind of sweet. Ok, Artie, I guess I can forgive you too but I know I'll probably hate you again soon because this is Glee, bitch. No one gets out without being just the worst on this show.
Finn approaches Rachel to apologize for being such an ass and admits that he really liked her but his actions pushed her away. Jessie approaches and challenges Finn to a sing off in the parking lot because he figures the rivalry is coming anyway but Finn welcomes him to the group, laughably saying that he doesn't want to carry the group by himself and is happy for the break. Oh, honey.
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| Of course you're carrying everyone. You're doing great, hon |
They shake on it, much to Rachel's disappointment, I think. Hey, girl loves drama and nothing is more dramatic than two guys fighting/singing over you. Instead, the guys walk off to practice together.
We cut to yet another song. Like a Prayer. It's a fine performance but I'm super burned out on the songs but that means that my recapping is done because after this is the end of the episode. They will never explain how the glee club affords an entire choir to perform for a practice with them but this show does not pretend to ever be realistic so just go with it.
Remember last season how there were maybe 3-4 songs an episode? This episode alone has 8. 8 flipping songs. Even if I'm fair and don't count the first Cheerios performance because that was just the original song playing while the Cheerios did their routine, that's still 7 songs in a 45 minute episode. It's a lot and for my tastes, a bit much. It wouldn't be so bad if the songs informed us about character or advanced the plot a bit but most of them are just little dance numbers or an exact music video recreation. It's tedious on rewatch but again, I'm not a Madonna fan so I guess if you are, this episode is probably amazing. I do question though, do you just want to watch fun performances or do you actually like the show? I started to feel like I was a minority for actually liking the dark humour and silly characters from last season. I wanted that developed but the writers seem incapable of making anything but over the top stereotype characters for cheap laughs. So, instead of putting the work in, they were hoping that stuffing the episodes with fun musical numbers would appease people. For the most part, I think it worked because the show was still a hit and people LOVED the extra songs. So what will we get in the next episode, Home? Will we hate more characters? Will we get more songs? Less songs? I guess we'll soon find out.
eight songs in one episode? god that must have been exhausting to rehease
ReplyDeleteIt really was, especially the back to back performances. I get it, Madonna let you have her songs, you don't have to do them all in one episode.
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